"AS A YOUNG MAN I BEGAN LIFE BY SEEKING TO ASSERT MY RIGHTS AND I SOON DISCOVERED I HAD NONE NOT EVEN OVER MY WIFE. SO I BEGAN BY DISCOVERING AND PERFORMING MY DUTY BY MY WIFE MY CHILDREN FRIENDS COMPANIONS AND SOCIETY AND I FIND TODAY THAT I HAVE GREATER RIGHTS, PERHAPS THAN ANY LIVING MAN I KNOW." - Cable to H.G. Wells, The Hindustan Times, 16 April 1940
America won. I don't say that with any pride, in fact, it gives me sort of a sick feeling inside.
Hedonism, consumerism, greed have been spread across the globe.
In 2003 (!), the China Daily announced that the 100th Kentucky Fried Chicken had opened in Beijing. Wikipedia lists 97 countries with KFC franchises including Iran, Pakistan, Kazakhstan, Syria, Yemen and nearly every other country in the Muslim world.
Is it any wonder that so much of the planet hates us?
In 1886, the Supreme Court of the United States made corporations 'people .' As 'people,' they have rights. Unfortunately, the Supreme Court did not give corporations souls.
Even in this country there is a love/hate relationship with the facts. Corporate America brings money and jobs, and with the money comes freedom and democracy. Liberal Americans also note that it comes with ecological damage and health damage. Conservative Americans note the sex and drugs.
'People' without souls are sociopaths.
10 May 2011
09 May 2011
On Osama's Death
A friend wanted to know what I thought about the killing of Osama bin Laden .
I've had a theory for a long time that the next step in human evolution would not be physical but spiritual - homo spiritus. It's not a new idea.
Evolution is not revolution. In evolution the new live among the old. The new don't kill off the old, they simply live longer and have more successful progeny; successful in the biological sense.
I think this is why so many of us seek guidance and sustenance of a higher power. We want to evolve. Some of that seeking leads to evolutionary dead-ends. Forms of creation that become too twisted to survive.
I'm not advocating killing such creatures off. The thing about evolution is that we don't have to kill them off.
I don't know whether Osama was a failed step on the evolutionary road. I just hope he was.
I was also thinking about what kind of a little boy Osama was. How was he raised? Did his mother and father love and nurture him or was he raised by surrogates? Did he have friends? Did he get to play silly games?
I don't think hatred is natural. I think it is learned. We see those around us frightened. We see fear become anger. We see sustained, unresolved anger become hate.
And our fear becomes anger.
And our anger becomes hate.
And we kill what we hate.
I've had a theory for a long time that the next step in human evolution would not be physical but spiritual - homo spiritus. It's not a new idea.
Evolution is not revolution. In evolution the new live among the old. The new don't kill off the old, they simply live longer and have more successful progeny; successful in the biological sense.
I think this is why so many of us seek guidance and sustenance of a higher power. We want to evolve. Some of that seeking leads to evolutionary dead-ends. Forms of creation that become too twisted to survive.
I'm not advocating killing such creatures off. The thing about evolution is that we don't have to kill them off.
I don't know whether Osama was a failed step on the evolutionary road. I just hope he was.
I was also thinking about what kind of a little boy Osama was. How was he raised? Did his mother and father love and nurture him or was he raised by surrogates? Did he have friends? Did he get to play silly games?
I don't think hatred is natural. I think it is learned. We see those around us frightened. We see fear become anger. We see sustained, unresolved anger become hate.
And our fear becomes anger.
And our anger becomes hate.
And we kill what we hate.
20 April 2011
Parenting Strangers, Grand Final - State Owned
They live in my house, but they're not my kids. They are owned by the State of Texas.
My wife and I are 'Professional Parents.' The state hires us to raise their kids.
We wanted a second or third grader. You know...young, cute, malleable, easy, sweet. We wanted a child without parents, a true orphan. Instead they gave us a really angry thirteen year old on heavy medication with a psycho-mother.
And we fell in love.
When a child first comes into your house, you have a couple of days to make sure its a fit. We knew almost immediately when this young lady entered our house that it was a fit. It was like we took one sniff and recognized that this was one of our own children who had been lost to us at birth. Maybe it was just because she was our first. We've never had this experience with any of the other young ladies that have come into our home.
We always come to love the kids in our home. We knew we would. It's just how we're built.
She's been with us for three years and will probably be with us until she graduates high school. Other young ladies have come and gone. Some for short periods, some for long. Some successful - in college. Some failures - handcuffs.
Right now, we have a young lady preparing to graduate high school and go on to college as well as our sixteen year old.
When you take a young person into your house as foster parents, they come with a lot of baggage. And not just the suit case and boxes and bags of stuff. Our lives are filled with judges and lawyers and case managers and case workers and therapists and mothers and siblings. We are inspected twice a month by the state to see that their children are all right. We get inspected by our case manager quarterly to make sure we are conforming to the law. We see two judges at least twice a year. They each visit their mothers semi-regularly. They both see a therapist at least twice a month. It can be a regular three ring circus.
And then there's the medications. Many places that take these kids use medication to control their behavior. Some need it. Many don't. And there's no one to help you figure it out.
It is the best thing we have ever done.
My wife and I are 'Professional Parents.' The state hires us to raise their kids.
We wanted a second or third grader. You know...young, cute, malleable, easy, sweet. We wanted a child without parents, a true orphan. Instead they gave us a really angry thirteen year old on heavy medication with a psycho-mother.
And we fell in love.
When a child first comes into your house, you have a couple of days to make sure its a fit. We knew almost immediately when this young lady entered our house that it was a fit. It was like we took one sniff and recognized that this was one of our own children who had been lost to us at birth. Maybe it was just because she was our first. We've never had this experience with any of the other young ladies that have come into our home.
We always come to love the kids in our home. We knew we would. It's just how we're built.
She's been with us for three years and will probably be with us until she graduates high school. Other young ladies have come and gone. Some for short periods, some for long. Some successful - in college. Some failures - handcuffs.
Right now, we have a young lady preparing to graduate high school and go on to college as well as our sixteen year old.
When you take a young person into your house as foster parents, they come with a lot of baggage. And not just the suit case and boxes and bags of stuff. Our lives are filled with judges and lawyers and case managers and case workers and therapists and mothers and siblings. We are inspected twice a month by the state to see that their children are all right. We get inspected by our case manager quarterly to make sure we are conforming to the law. We see two judges at least twice a year. They each visit their mothers semi-regularly. They both see a therapist at least twice a month. It can be a regular three ring circus.
And then there's the medications. Many places that take these kids use medication to control their behavior. Some need it. Many don't. And there's no one to help you figure it out.
It is the best thing we have ever done.
19 April 2011
Parenting Strangers, part 2 - Thugs & Gangsters
First, a fact - better than 30% of the kids that enter high school do not graduate. It's been that way for a long time.
In the early 90's, I took a job with the City in a youth program that didn't yet exist. The idea was simple. Hire kids who had dropped out, were on probation or parole, and give them a job and teach them primary job skills.
Primary job skills are the stuff most of us understand without being taught; how to show up, how to show up on time, how to dress appropriately, how to take instruction from a supervisor, etc. Stuff we learned because our parents cared enough to send us to school everyday, on time, looking nice, and then asked us in the evening how school went and whether or not we had any homework. Stuff we learned because our parents had jobs.
We hired four kids and we were lucky. The first four were bright and wanted a chance to do something with their lives. They all had rap-sheets as long as your arm and had spent considerable time in juvenile detention. One of them was arrested and sent to prison along with a couple of his buddies for carjacking and killing an old man after he'd been with us for about six months. The other three had jobs, one was married, and they were doing well last time I checked.
My job was to take out a work crew and mow all the Fire Department properties in the city. It's a big city. There are a lot of Fire Stations ranging in size from half an acre to twenty acres. That first year was a challenge. I lead by example.
The program was a success. After a year, we hired more leaders and more kids and took on new jobs.
The City Management was confused. We were successful, i.e., our kids stayed out of jail when they were with us and for long afterwords and organization from all over the country were surprised and envious of our success. But the liability of having large numbers of thugs and gangsters on the city payroll was a strain on their tolerance.
I loved the kids. But the City Management was horrible. So bad, I finally quit in the year 2000.
There were other factors; personal issues and a desire to write.
In the early 90's, I took a job with the City in a youth program that didn't yet exist. The idea was simple. Hire kids who had dropped out, were on probation or parole, and give them a job and teach them primary job skills.
Primary job skills are the stuff most of us understand without being taught; how to show up, how to show up on time, how to dress appropriately, how to take instruction from a supervisor, etc. Stuff we learned because our parents cared enough to send us to school everyday, on time, looking nice, and then asked us in the evening how school went and whether or not we had any homework. Stuff we learned because our parents had jobs.
We hired four kids and we were lucky. The first four were bright and wanted a chance to do something with their lives. They all had rap-sheets as long as your arm and had spent considerable time in juvenile detention. One of them was arrested and sent to prison along with a couple of his buddies for carjacking and killing an old man after he'd been with us for about six months. The other three had jobs, one was married, and they were doing well last time I checked.
My job was to take out a work crew and mow all the Fire Department properties in the city. It's a big city. There are a lot of Fire Stations ranging in size from half an acre to twenty acres. That first year was a challenge. I lead by example.
The program was a success. After a year, we hired more leaders and more kids and took on new jobs.
The City Management was confused. We were successful, i.e., our kids stayed out of jail when they were with us and for long afterwords and organization from all over the country were surprised and envious of our success. But the liability of having large numbers of thugs and gangsters on the city payroll was a strain on their tolerance.
I loved the kids. But the City Management was horrible. So bad, I finally quit in the year 2000.
There were other factors; personal issues and a desire to write.
15 April 2011
Parenting Strangers, part 1 - The Early Years
I began working with children shortly after my 10-month old son died of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome in 1982. I was attending the University of Texas after 4 years in the Air Force. I came home one afternoon and got a phone call that my son was in the hospital. By the time I got there, he was pronounced dead.
A few months later, a friend at the Episcopalian/Anglican church we were attending asked if I wanted to teach a Sunday School Class of second graders. I don't know why I said yes. I had volunteered in Headstart during college and the experience was wonderful, and I loved being a Sunday School teacher.
Normally, I am a shy and reclusive person, but in front of a group of children, I am transformed into an outgoing, silly person. I loved that me.
After several years of teaching Sunday School, a voice inside me (I think it was God) began to nudge me toward working with teenagers. I was frightened, but I gave it a try as a volunteer with the youth group at my church. I love the earnestness of teenagers. I love the struggle they have to become individuals, to discover their own unique identity. I love their passion.
And I discovered an honesty in myself that was lacking. To reach teenagers, I had to dig deep into myself. Some of what I found, I didn't like and it took me years to dredge that filth up into the light and let go of it.
I also discovered a wacky sense of humor to which teenagers responded. A line from W.C. Fields always runs through my head. "You take life too seriously. I was only trying to guess your weight." Because teenagers are earnest in the extreme. So many teens think that every little thing in life has great depth and meaning. Life does have depth and meaning, but if I don't laugh, that only leaves crying and I don't cope well when I'm crying.
A few months later, a friend at the Episcopalian/Anglican church we were attending asked if I wanted to teach a Sunday School Class of second graders. I don't know why I said yes. I had volunteered in Headstart during college and the experience was wonderful, and I loved being a Sunday School teacher.
Normally, I am a shy and reclusive person, but in front of a group of children, I am transformed into an outgoing, silly person. I loved that me.
After several years of teaching Sunday School, a voice inside me (I think it was God) began to nudge me toward working with teenagers. I was frightened, but I gave it a try as a volunteer with the youth group at my church. I love the earnestness of teenagers. I love the struggle they have to become individuals, to discover their own unique identity. I love their passion.
And I discovered an honesty in myself that was lacking. To reach teenagers, I had to dig deep into myself. Some of what I found, I didn't like and it took me years to dredge that filth up into the light and let go of it.
I also discovered a wacky sense of humor to which teenagers responded. A line from W.C. Fields always runs through my head. "You take life too seriously. I was only trying to guess your weight." Because teenagers are earnest in the extreme. So many teens think that every little thing in life has great depth and meaning. Life does have depth and meaning, but if I don't laugh, that only leaves crying and I don't cope well when I'm crying.
12 April 2011
Sloth
"But my creed is non-violence under all circumstances. My method is conversion, not coercion; it is self-suffering, not the suffering of the tyrant. I know that method to be infallible. I know that a whole people can adopt it without understanding its philosophy. People generally do not understand the philosophy of all their acts." - 'Independence v. Swaraj,' Young India, 12 Jan. 1928
I'm one of those people who does not understand the philosophy. In fact, for me, philosophy is a dirty word.
I don't often struggle with knowing what the right thing to do is, I struggle with doing it.
That's why I read Gandhi, Dr. King, John Lewis, Dorothy Day, Daniel and Philip Berrigan, and others who think and write about non-violence - to motivate me to action. They know the philosophy much better than I ever could.
My sin is laziness.
I'm one of those people who does not understand the philosophy. In fact, for me, philosophy is a dirty word.
I don't often struggle with knowing what the right thing to do is, I struggle with doing it.
That's why I read Gandhi, Dr. King, John Lewis, Dorothy Day, Daniel and Philip Berrigan, and others who think and write about non-violence - to motivate me to action. They know the philosophy much better than I ever could.
My sin is laziness.
11 April 2011
Duck and Cover II
"I must not contemplate darkness before it stares me in the face. And in no case can I be party, irrespective of non-violence, to a universal strike and capture of power. Though, therefore, I do not know what I should do in the case of a breakdown, I know that the actuality will find me ready with an alternative. My sole reliance being on the living Power which we call God, He will put the alternative in my hands when the time has come, not a minute sooner." - 'Independence,' Harijan, 28 July 1946 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
Since my first air raid drill when I was seven, 1962, ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_tKAg5KIuQ), I have contemplated darkness. Even a seven year old knew that nuclear war would be apocalyptic.
By the age of seventeen, I didn't believe I would live to be thirty. Someone would use 'the bomb.' And not just one bomb, but lots and lots and lots of bombs.
Miracles happen. 'The bomb' has never been used...so far.
In this country (USA), politicians talk about the 'third rail' of politics (the 'third rail' refers to a dangerous, not-to-be-touched, train rail between the two main rails that provides electricity for subway systems and the like). By that they mean the government provided social safety net that prevents the elderly, the disabled, and children from starving to death or dying from disease.
My country still has thousands of nuclear bombs buried in corn fields in Kansas. Still has them deep under the oceans in submarines. Still keeps them loaded on airplanes that are flying at the edge of the go/no-go line. No one ever talks about the fact that this country is still prepared to destroy the planet on a moments notice.
This is not the third rail of American politics. This is buried in our backyard.
There I go again, contemplating darkness.
Miracles happen.
I believe with Gandhi, that God will put alternatives in our hands and until then, I must learn to hope and I must work for peace.
Since my first air raid drill when I was seven, 1962, ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_tKAg5KIuQ), I have contemplated darkness. Even a seven year old knew that nuclear war would be apocalyptic.
By the age of seventeen, I didn't believe I would live to be thirty. Someone would use 'the bomb.' And not just one bomb, but lots and lots and lots of bombs.
Miracles happen. 'The bomb' has never been used...so far.
In this country (USA), politicians talk about the 'third rail' of politics (the 'third rail' refers to a dangerous, not-to-be-touched, train rail between the two main rails that provides electricity for subway systems and the like). By that they mean the government provided social safety net that prevents the elderly, the disabled, and children from starving to death or dying from disease.
My country still has thousands of nuclear bombs buried in corn fields in Kansas. Still has them deep under the oceans in submarines. Still keeps them loaded on airplanes that are flying at the edge of the go/no-go line. No one ever talks about the fact that this country is still prepared to destroy the planet on a moments notice.
This is not the third rail of American politics. This is buried in our backyard.
There I go again, contemplating darkness.
Miracles happen.
I believe with Gandhi, that God will put alternatives in our hands and until then, I must learn to hope and I must work for peace.
07 April 2011
Vote
"The country does need politicians." - 'Advice to Constructive Workers' (G.), Biharni Komi Agman, pp. 346-7 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
I vote. I think it is a citizen's duty to vote.
Many in my country who voted for Barack Obama have been disappointed. I am not one of those. I voted for Obama and he is exactly what I expected, a politician. I hoped he would be something different, but I did not expect it, and so I am not disappointed.
Rarely in history has voting changed anything. And when voting has changed things, more often than not, it has been a change for the worse.
Sounds cynical, I know, and perhaps it is, but reliance on someone else to change things, rather than being the change I want to see, doesn't seem sensible.
I was familiar with civil disobedience and non-cooperation from the civil rights protests in my country in the sixties, but it was Gandhi's ideas about the Constructive Programme that struck me as truly revolutionary. It is the part of Gandhi's vision that my country does not really know or understand, and for me it is what can make real change a reality, right here and right now.
I vote. I think it is a citizen's duty to vote.
Many in my country who voted for Barack Obama have been disappointed. I am not one of those. I voted for Obama and he is exactly what I expected, a politician. I hoped he would be something different, but I did not expect it, and so I am not disappointed.
Rarely in history has voting changed anything. And when voting has changed things, more often than not, it has been a change for the worse.
Sounds cynical, I know, and perhaps it is, but reliance on someone else to change things, rather than being the change I want to see, doesn't seem sensible.
I was familiar with civil disobedience and non-cooperation from the civil rights protests in my country in the sixties, but it was Gandhi's ideas about the Constructive Programme that struck me as truly revolutionary. It is the part of Gandhi's vision that my country does not really know or understand, and for me it is what can make real change a reality, right here and right now.
04 April 2011
Weapon of Massive Consumption*
I am a 'victim' of American culture. Okay, 'victim' is not the right word. Mass consumer would be more accurate.
If you peruse previous blog posts you will find quotes from, besides Gandhi, Will Rogers and Sheryl Crow and who knows who else.
I love old movies, Theodora goes Wild, The Awful Truth, everything by the Marx Brothers, and new movies, Little Miss Sunshine, Despicable Me. My iTunes playlist has the lastest songs, Hayes Carll - KMAG YOYO, Arcade Fire - Ready to Start, Baaba Maal - International and classics from the 30's and 40's, Helen Kane - I Wanna be Loved by You, Judy Garland - The Boy Next Door. I've watched television since it was invented. At fourteen my best friend and I found, in a neighbors trash, three years worth of Playboy Magazines which we divided evenly and I kept under my mattress for years. I have been an admire of the female form ever since. I've studied Aristophanes and Dostoyevsky and Edgar Rice Burroughs and George Bernard Shaw and Samuel Beckett. I collected comedy records, Nichols and May, Bill Cosby, George Carlin. And all this stuff and much more filters into my thoughts, speech, actions, and writings. And I am proud of that. And many, many of these things inspire, excite, and energize me.
I love good food and I love cooking good food from all over the world, India, Mexico, Iraq, Italy, South Africa. My wife feels loved when I provide delicious meals for our family. I get joy from providing hospitality for friends and strangers. Breaking bread with friends, family, and strangers is a spiritual experience.
My spirituality is a mish-mash, part Native American, part Christian, part Buddhist, part Jewish, part stuff that I've decided to believe entirely on my own. (The missing matter in the universe is comprised of Angels.)
Would Gandhi approve? No.
But I don't apologize for any of this.
I believe that God, the Great Father, the Creator, a power greater than myself, put me on this earth, here and now, because he wants my help to change the world for the better. Well, 'me' is all these things and more.
And the people, children, that I was put here to help don't want some ascetic who knows nothing of the world. They want people who can help them understand where they are, where they came from, what's going on around them, and the problems that they have to overcome.
And I believe in non-violence. Without reservation.
God uses me as I am.
*from the song The Fear by Lily Allen.
If you peruse previous blog posts you will find quotes from, besides Gandhi, Will Rogers and Sheryl Crow and who knows who else.
I love old movies, Theodora goes Wild, The Awful Truth, everything by the Marx Brothers, and new movies, Little Miss Sunshine, Despicable Me. My iTunes playlist has the lastest songs, Hayes Carll - KMAG YOYO, Arcade Fire - Ready to Start, Baaba Maal - International and classics from the 30's and 40's, Helen Kane - I Wanna be Loved by You, Judy Garland - The Boy Next Door. I've watched television since it was invented. At fourteen my best friend and I found, in a neighbors trash, three years worth of Playboy Magazines which we divided evenly and I kept under my mattress for years. I have been an admire of the female form ever since. I've studied Aristophanes and Dostoyevsky and Edgar Rice Burroughs and George Bernard Shaw and Samuel Beckett. I collected comedy records, Nichols and May, Bill Cosby, George Carlin. And all this stuff and much more filters into my thoughts, speech, actions, and writings. And I am proud of that. And many, many of these things inspire, excite, and energize me.
I love good food and I love cooking good food from all over the world, India, Mexico, Iraq, Italy, South Africa. My wife feels loved when I provide delicious meals for our family. I get joy from providing hospitality for friends and strangers. Breaking bread with friends, family, and strangers is a spiritual experience.
My spirituality is a mish-mash, part Native American, part Christian, part Buddhist, part Jewish, part stuff that I've decided to believe entirely on my own. (The missing matter in the universe is comprised of Angels.)
Would Gandhi approve? No.
But I don't apologize for any of this.
I believe that God, the Great Father, the Creator, a power greater than myself, put me on this earth, here and now, because he wants my help to change the world for the better. Well, 'me' is all these things and more.
And the people, children, that I was put here to help don't want some ascetic who knows nothing of the world. They want people who can help them understand where they are, where they came from, what's going on around them, and the problems that they have to overcome.
And I believe in non-violence. Without reservation.
God uses me as I am.
*from the song The Fear by Lily Allen.
02 April 2011
Lock and Load
"We forget the principle of non-violence, which is the essence of all religions. The doctrine of arms stands for irreligion." -'Satyagraha - Not Passive Resistance' (H.), Ramchandra Varma, Mahatma Gandhi, about 2 September 1917 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
I am no saint. I grew up playing Cowboys and Indians (the Native American kind) with plastic guns. I owned plastic armies of men and tanks. I have played video games where gun mayhem was the chief objective.
As a boy, I went to a summer camp with a shooting range. I enjoyed target shooting and was pretty good at it. My father hunted game birds with a shotgun and bought me a gun and took me on a number of hunting outings. I never shot anything, although, I would have if the opportunity had ever arisen. In the Air Force, I was trained to shoot an M-16 rifle. I was a very good shot and received a Marksman's ribbon.
I am not squeamish about guns, although, I don't own any. And while I cannot conceive of any reason why someone would feel they needed to own a gun, I have no desire to tell someone that they cannot own a gun.
A new law was recently passed in one state (Iowa) of the United States. The law makes it permissible to carry a gun out in the open. In fact, in the United States, only seven states do not permit some level of 'open carry.' In twelve states, there is no licensing or permit needed to carry a gun in the open. The only restriction are to criminals and the mentally ill. Many Americans think this makes them safer.
We have a saying in this country, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." This is certainly true, however, guns make it much, much, much easier. An impulsive act, a fit of anger, a strange thought, a slight misjudgment, can lead almost instantly to someone's death if a gun is strapped to a hip or on the seat of a car.
Yes, people can be stabbed with a knife, but this act has to be up close and personal. It takes time to stab someone. Even in a crowd. Not so a gun.
Bang, bang, bang. Three dead. One second.
Hope there were no innocent bystanders.
I just can't see Jesus "packin' heat."
I am no saint. I grew up playing Cowboys and Indians (the Native American kind) with plastic guns. I owned plastic armies of men and tanks. I have played video games where gun mayhem was the chief objective.
As a boy, I went to a summer camp with a shooting range. I enjoyed target shooting and was pretty good at it. My father hunted game birds with a shotgun and bought me a gun and took me on a number of hunting outings. I never shot anything, although, I would have if the opportunity had ever arisen. In the Air Force, I was trained to shoot an M-16 rifle. I was a very good shot and received a Marksman's ribbon.
I am not squeamish about guns, although, I don't own any. And while I cannot conceive of any reason why someone would feel they needed to own a gun, I have no desire to tell someone that they cannot own a gun.
A new law was recently passed in one state (Iowa) of the United States. The law makes it permissible to carry a gun out in the open. In fact, in the United States, only seven states do not permit some level of 'open carry.' In twelve states, there is no licensing or permit needed to carry a gun in the open. The only restriction are to criminals and the mentally ill. Many Americans think this makes them safer.
We have a saying in this country, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." This is certainly true, however, guns make it much, much, much easier. An impulsive act, a fit of anger, a strange thought, a slight misjudgment, can lead almost instantly to someone's death if a gun is strapped to a hip or on the seat of a car.
Yes, people can be stabbed with a knife, but this act has to be up close and personal. It takes time to stab someone. Even in a crowd. Not so a gun.
Bang, bang, bang. Three dead. One second.
Hope there were no innocent bystanders.
I just can't see Jesus "packin' heat."
01 April 2011
Children - The Number One Threat to National Security
"Its use (Passive Resistance*), therefore, is, I think, indisputable, and it is a force which, if it became universal, would revolutionize social ideals and do away with despotisms and the ever-growing militarism under which the nations of the West are groaning and are being almost crushed to death, and which fairly promises to overwhelm even the nations of the East." -'Theory and Practice of Passive Resistance,' Indian Opinion, Golden Number, 1 Dec. 1914 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
As I watch my country try to balance it's budget by slashing money for children, the poor, and the sick, and I hear almost no voices talking about reducing the number of soldiers, guns, bombs, and weapons of mass destruction, I can only hang my head in shame. The richest nation in the world can keep enough nuclear weapons to destroy the world several times over, can develop the most high-tech weaponry for the slaughter of other human beings, can fight three wars, but won't take care of it's own neglected, abused, and orphaned children.
And the irony is, that even if they cut every dollar for every child in this country, we would still have a massive debt because of the money we spend on military weapons to abuse, orphan, or kill other people's children.
Apparently the politicians in this country consider children to be the biggest threat to our nation's security.
This is not higher mathematics. You don't have to be a rocket scientist or a brain surgeon to figure this stuff out.
The truth is that the politicians in this country are liars and we want to be lied to. If we didn't want that, we would stop voting for these people. And it's not one party or the other. Both parties are in this together.
The Policy of the United States of America: Neglect, Abuse, Orphan, and Kill Children - ours, other peoples, doesn't matter.
Neglect, Abuse, Orphan, and Kill Children.
*Gandhi explained earlier in the quoted article that the term 'Passive Resistance' was really a misnomer for what he called satyagraha, Truth-Force and what Tolstoy called Soul-Force or Love-Force.
As I watch my country try to balance it's budget by slashing money for children, the poor, and the sick, and I hear almost no voices talking about reducing the number of soldiers, guns, bombs, and weapons of mass destruction, I can only hang my head in shame. The richest nation in the world can keep enough nuclear weapons to destroy the world several times over, can develop the most high-tech weaponry for the slaughter of other human beings, can fight three wars, but won't take care of it's own neglected, abused, and orphaned children.
And the irony is, that even if they cut every dollar for every child in this country, we would still have a massive debt because of the money we spend on military weapons to abuse, orphan, or kill other people's children.
Apparently the politicians in this country consider children to be the biggest threat to our nation's security.
This is not higher mathematics. You don't have to be a rocket scientist or a brain surgeon to figure this stuff out.
The truth is that the politicians in this country are liars and we want to be lied to. If we didn't want that, we would stop voting for these people. And it's not one party or the other. Both parties are in this together.
The Policy of the United States of America: Neglect, Abuse, Orphan, and Kill Children - ours, other peoples, doesn't matter.
Neglect, Abuse, Orphan, and Kill Children.
*Gandhi explained earlier in the quoted article that the term 'Passive Resistance' was really a misnomer for what he called satyagraha, Truth-Force and what Tolstoy called Soul-Force or Love-Force.
29 March 2011
Last year we said, 'Things can't go on like this', and they didn't, they got worse.
"Politics, divorced of religion, have absolutely no meaning."- Speech on 'Ashram Vows' at the YMCA, Madras, Indian Review, February 1916, The Hindu, 16 Feb. 1916 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
By nature, I am not a political animal. The arcane and convoluted workings of my government, even my local city government, much less the national government, seem contradictory, hypocritical, self-serving, and tedious, not to mention ineffective, if not outright damaging, and meaningless.
My country has never lived up to its ideals and often is engaged in action that is directly and demonstrably against what we say we believe and this has been true since our founding. Genocide, slavery, persecution, and theft mark my nation's heritage, mocking the pretty words of our Declaration of Independence and our Constitution.
As I read Gandhi's words and consider my country's history of the 'separation of church and state' and the recent struggles in my country and around the world with conservative/fundamentalist religious radicals, I find myself frustrated. The elements in America that wish to bring 'religion' back into politics are largely intolerant and would love to impose a form of Christian 'Sharia Law.' The separation of church and state is one of the bulwarks against this.
But the immorality, the unethical behavior, the evil that my government and its representatives, secular or religious, conservative or liberal, Republican or Democrat, perpetrate on their own people and the people of the world is wrong.
Too many people like me, see the problems and we tsk-tsk or we sit on our hands or we turn our heads away.
It's easier than screaming in rage or crying.
Got to be a better way.
Title from a quote by Will Rogers
By nature, I am not a political animal. The arcane and convoluted workings of my government, even my local city government, much less the national government, seem contradictory, hypocritical, self-serving, and tedious, not to mention ineffective, if not outright damaging, and meaningless.
My country has never lived up to its ideals and often is engaged in action that is directly and demonstrably against what we say we believe and this has been true since our founding. Genocide, slavery, persecution, and theft mark my nation's heritage, mocking the pretty words of our Declaration of Independence and our Constitution.
As I read Gandhi's words and consider my country's history of the 'separation of church and state' and the recent struggles in my country and around the world with conservative/fundamentalist religious radicals, I find myself frustrated. The elements in America that wish to bring 'religion' back into politics are largely intolerant and would love to impose a form of Christian 'Sharia Law.' The separation of church and state is one of the bulwarks against this.
But the immorality, the unethical behavior, the evil that my government and its representatives, secular or religious, conservative or liberal, Republican or Democrat, perpetrate on their own people and the people of the world is wrong.
Too many people like me, see the problems and we tsk-tsk or we sit on our hands or we turn our heads away.
It's easier than screaming in rage or crying.
Got to be a better way.
Title from a quote by Will Rogers
28 March 2011
Neighbors as Ourselves
"In this Ashram, we make it a rule that we must say 'No' when we mean 'No', regardless of consequences." - Speech on 'Ashram Vows' at the YMCA, Madras, Indian Review, February 1916, The Hindu, 16 Feb. 1916 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
My efforts at lobbying in support of the abused, neglected, and orphaned children in the state of Texas continued this morning.
After my disappointing and disheartening trip to the State Capitol last week, to talk to my local representative about the upcoming budget for these children, I wrote an email to the representative describing my position and my experience in her office. A return email from a staffer requested my telephone number so that she could speak with me about my experience and about the representatives support for the children of the state. I sent my number, but included that there was no need to call. That I did in fact understand what role the representative played in writing budgets and that the representative could still count on my support (which she can. Her opponents have made this state last among states in spending for children.)
She called this morning. I was polite. I was understanding. I was respectful. I'm afraid that what I was not was truthful. I'm afraid I let politeness smother the truth as I understand it.
What my representative agreed to in the budget will be a greater hardship for the children already suffering trauma.
I know that there are people in the world who would see the 'hardship' of my state as a huge step forward for their children. Their children lack food and clean water and shelter. Their lives are torn apart by disease and war.
I cannot reconcile these two worlds. I wish I could.
What I can do is speak for those being injured in my neighborhood.
But I must learn to lovingly speak the harsh truth and not hide the truth behind a curtain of politeness.
My efforts at lobbying in support of the abused, neglected, and orphaned children in the state of Texas continued this morning.
After my disappointing and disheartening trip to the State Capitol last week, to talk to my local representative about the upcoming budget for these children, I wrote an email to the representative describing my position and my experience in her office. A return email from a staffer requested my telephone number so that she could speak with me about my experience and about the representatives support for the children of the state. I sent my number, but included that there was no need to call. That I did in fact understand what role the representative played in writing budgets and that the representative could still count on my support (which she can. Her opponents have made this state last among states in spending for children.)
She called this morning. I was polite. I was understanding. I was respectful. I'm afraid that what I was not was truthful. I'm afraid I let politeness smother the truth as I understand it.
What my representative agreed to in the budget will be a greater hardship for the children already suffering trauma.
I know that there are people in the world who would see the 'hardship' of my state as a huge step forward for their children. Their children lack food and clean water and shelter. Their lives are torn apart by disease and war.
I cannot reconcile these two worlds. I wish I could.
What I can do is speak for those being injured in my neighborhood.
But I must learn to lovingly speak the harsh truth and not hide the truth behind a curtain of politeness.
26 March 2011
"The End of the World as We Know It"
"I hold that he who invented the atom bomb has committed the gravest sin in the world of science. The only weapon that can save the world is non-violence. Considering the trend of the world, I might appear a fool to everyone; but I do not feel sorry for it. I rather consider it a great blessing that God did not make me capable of inventing the atom bomb." - Talk with Englishmen (G.), Biharni Komi Agman, pp. 253-4 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
I am not capable of inventing the atom bomb. I am, however, capable of loading an atom bomb on an airplane, strapping in the pilots, starting the engines, and taxiing the plane out of the bunker it was stored in, and I have done just that.
The birth of my biological daughter and son were paid for because I could do that. My home loan was cheaper and my loan was guaranteed because I could do that. My health insurance is paid for because I could do that. I can be buried in a hero's grave because I did that.
I have practiced the end of the world, many, many times.
At the time, I thought my motives were good. I was not a patriot protecting my country, I was a husband supporting his family.
I didn't think I had any other options at the time, and I am not ashamed that I made that choice.
But the sin is a heavy weight.
A heavy weight that has opened my eyes to what I believe to be the true path; non-violence.
I am not capable of inventing the atom bomb. I am, however, capable of loading an atom bomb on an airplane, strapping in the pilots, starting the engines, and taxiing the plane out of the bunker it was stored in, and I have done just that.
The birth of my biological daughter and son were paid for because I could do that. My home loan was cheaper and my loan was guaranteed because I could do that. My health insurance is paid for because I could do that. I can be buried in a hero's grave because I did that.
I have practiced the end of the world, many, many times.
At the time, I thought my motives were good. I was not a patriot protecting my country, I was a husband supporting his family.
I didn't think I had any other options at the time, and I am not ashamed that I made that choice.
But the sin is a heavy weight.
A heavy weight that has opened my eyes to what I believe to be the true path; non-violence.
25 March 2011
The Least of These
"Every sin is a form of violence."- 'Problem of Non-Violence,' Navajivan, 6 June 1926 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
I'm a foster parent.
My state, like many states, is having sever budget issues. Yesterday, I went to my State Capitol to rally and lobby to restore the funds cut from the proposed State Budget for the agency that oversees abused and neglected children. I won't bore you with the details, even if I fully understood them, but suffice it to say, that the proposed cuts would devastate a protection system that is already last in the country in helping children.
I was brushed off by my local state representative, one of the few liberals left in my state's government, and I found out that this representative was actually responsible for writing this section of the proposed budget. She defends the budget by saying how much worse it could be.
I sat down in the halls of government and watched, and prayed, and thought.
Everything in the Capitol Building is over-sized, gilded, hand carved and covered in leather. Twenty foot high ceilings and doors. Marble walls, columns, statuary. Enormous wooden door frames and stair railings. Huge paintings of the important battles for independence. Portraits of every Governor, many of whom have gone on to be President. And gold and bronze gilded everything. The place was designed for fifteen foot high humans who stride like gods through the halls.
I went out onto the grounds of the Capitol and found what the plaque said was a collection of six statues of school children created with funds donated by school children in 1993. "A Tribute to Texas School Children" the plaque was titled. Only four of the statues were there. The base for a fifth was still there, the sixth base was missing.
I wanted to cry.
The giants of the Texas Legislature and the school children of Texas.
"Every sin is a form of violence."
I'm a foster parent.
My state, like many states, is having sever budget issues. Yesterday, I went to my State Capitol to rally and lobby to restore the funds cut from the proposed State Budget for the agency that oversees abused and neglected children. I won't bore you with the details, even if I fully understood them, but suffice it to say, that the proposed cuts would devastate a protection system that is already last in the country in helping children.
I was brushed off by my local state representative, one of the few liberals left in my state's government, and I found out that this representative was actually responsible for writing this section of the proposed budget. She defends the budget by saying how much worse it could be.
I sat down in the halls of government and watched, and prayed, and thought.
Everything in the Capitol Building is over-sized, gilded, hand carved and covered in leather. Twenty foot high ceilings and doors. Marble walls, columns, statuary. Enormous wooden door frames and stair railings. Huge paintings of the important battles for independence. Portraits of every Governor, many of whom have gone on to be President. And gold and bronze gilded everything. The place was designed for fifteen foot high humans who stride like gods through the halls.
I went out onto the grounds of the Capitol and found what the plaque said was a collection of six statues of school children created with funds donated by school children in 1993. "A Tribute to Texas School Children" the plaque was titled. Only four of the statues were there. The base for a fifth was still there, the sixth base was missing.
I wanted to cry.
The giants of the Texas Legislature and the school children of Texas.
"Every sin is a form of violence."
24 March 2011
Deep Down Inside, I'm Really Very Shallow
"Everyone should follow his or her own inner voice. If he or she has no ears to listen to it, he or she should do the best he or she can." - 'Non-Violence,' Harijan, 29 June 1947
My mother used to say about herself that 'Deep down inside, I'm really very shallow." I've always felt that this described me.
I pray. I meditate. I daily seek guidance from a Higher Power. I have a spiritual community and I am an active member. But 'Deep down inside, I'm really very shallow.'
I won't say that I have never heard from my inner voice, but it's rare. I, apparently, often, have 'no ears to listen.' That's why I read Gandhi and others who do have 'ears to listen.' That's why I have a spiritual community. These people had and have 'ears to listen,' and I seek their wisdom and guidance.
I don't think I have to reinvent the wheel. Better people than I have shown the way. I can walk in their footprints.
And I don't worry about being sheep-like. My life and experience , my personality, the place I choose to live, the things I think are important, are different from anyone and everyone else. The way I am guided by the those who have ears, will not resemble anything anyone else has done.
I will continue to try and follow my own inner voice, but when that voice is silent or I am unable to hear, I have voices from the past who have marked the path and I have friends and companions whom I trust who help steer me back onto that path when I go astray.
I'm grateful.
My mother used to say about herself that 'Deep down inside, I'm really very shallow." I've always felt that this described me.
I pray. I meditate. I daily seek guidance from a Higher Power. I have a spiritual community and I am an active member. But 'Deep down inside, I'm really very shallow.'
I won't say that I have never heard from my inner voice, but it's rare. I, apparently, often, have 'no ears to listen.' That's why I read Gandhi and others who do have 'ears to listen.' That's why I have a spiritual community. These people had and have 'ears to listen,' and I seek their wisdom and guidance.
I don't think I have to reinvent the wheel. Better people than I have shown the way. I can walk in their footprints.
And I don't worry about being sheep-like. My life and experience , my personality, the place I choose to live, the things I think are important, are different from anyone and everyone else. The way I am guided by the those who have ears, will not resemble anything anyone else has done.
I will continue to try and follow my own inner voice, but when that voice is silent or I am unable to hear, I have voices from the past who have marked the path and I have friends and companions whom I trust who help steer me back onto that path when I go astray.
I'm grateful.
23 March 2011
Right Here, Right Now
"Our non-violence has to begin at home with our children, elders, neighbours, and friends." - Fragment of a Letter to Abdul Ghaffar Khan, Harijan, 18 Jan 1942 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
I dream, I pray, for non-violence in far away lands. I practice non-violence in my front yard.
I live on a neighborhood street that is used to reach the local high school and other streets that lead out into the city. I spend time in my front yard greeting strangers and neighbors who pass by and I plant shrubbery and trees along the edge of the street to narrow the lanes and slow the speeding traffic.
I compost.
I recycle anything and everything that I can.
I live in a semi-arid land. I dig up the plants that are water hogs, e.g. my lawn, and I plant native plants.
I ride my bicycle to the store.
I have two beautiful foster daughters. Tomorrow, I will visit my locally elected representatives at the state capitol to lobby for continued support for abused and orphaned children as the legislators consider cuts to the budget.
I have an ever expanding garden to grow as much of my food as I can.
I buy local, organic fruits and vegetables whenever it is available.
It's a small start. There is much more that I could do, but I am still at the beginning of this journey.
I dream, I pray, for non-violence in far away lands. I practice non-violence in my front yard.
I live on a neighborhood street that is used to reach the local high school and other streets that lead out into the city. I spend time in my front yard greeting strangers and neighbors who pass by and I plant shrubbery and trees along the edge of the street to narrow the lanes and slow the speeding traffic.
I compost.
I recycle anything and everything that I can.
I live in a semi-arid land. I dig up the plants that are water hogs, e.g. my lawn, and I plant native plants.
I ride my bicycle to the store.
I have two beautiful foster daughters. Tomorrow, I will visit my locally elected representatives at the state capitol to lobby for continued support for abused and orphaned children as the legislators consider cuts to the budget.
I have an ever expanding garden to grow as much of my food as I can.
I buy local, organic fruits and vegetables whenever it is available.
It's a small start. There is much more that I could do, but I am still at the beginning of this journey.
22 March 2011
Self-Purification
"Non-violence implies as complete self-purification as is humanly possible." - "The Greatest Force," Harijan, 12 Oct. 1935 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
I struggle with Gandhi's often puritanical approach to non-violence. I want to be a better person. I want to eliminate violence from my life. I believe in prayer and spiritual growth, but I am not seeking moksha, spiritual release from the cycle of death and reincarnation. I do not have Gandhi's understanding of what happens after death. I'm not sure what happens after death. And I certainly don't want the success or failure of non-violence in the world even slightly dependent on how close to perfection I come. I am, and I'm afraid I will always be, far, far from perfection.
I believe in a God that can redeem the mistakes I make and the awful tragedies that happen in the world. Karma, actions and deeds that shape past, present and future events, is not a part of what I believe.
I don't want to be purified. I'm happy being a muddled human being, fumbling my way through life, trusting that God will take my humble offerings and do something miraculous. I trust God will do this, because I have seen God do this in the past, and not just in my life, but in the lives of friends and relatives and strangers.
This is not an excuse for laziness or lack of effort or not working on personal growth or any other failure to do whatever it is in my power to do that can help change the world, but I trust that the feebleness of my efforts will not keep God from taking them and multiplying them a thousand fold or ten thousand fold.
I may be wrong. I will certainly keep asking God to help me overcome my defects of character, my greed, my sloth, my lust, my gluttony, etc., and perhaps God will work miracles in me. I don't believe that God needs my help, I think God wants my help and that's why God created me as I am, foibles and all.
I struggle with Gandhi's often puritanical approach to non-violence. I want to be a better person. I want to eliminate violence from my life. I believe in prayer and spiritual growth, but I am not seeking moksha, spiritual release from the cycle of death and reincarnation. I do not have Gandhi's understanding of what happens after death. I'm not sure what happens after death. And I certainly don't want the success or failure of non-violence in the world even slightly dependent on how close to perfection I come. I am, and I'm afraid I will always be, far, far from perfection.
I believe in a God that can redeem the mistakes I make and the awful tragedies that happen in the world. Karma, actions and deeds that shape past, present and future events, is not a part of what I believe.
I don't want to be purified. I'm happy being a muddled human being, fumbling my way through life, trusting that God will take my humble offerings and do something miraculous. I trust God will do this, because I have seen God do this in the past, and not just in my life, but in the lives of friends and relatives and strangers.
This is not an excuse for laziness or lack of effort or not working on personal growth or any other failure to do whatever it is in my power to do that can help change the world, but I trust that the feebleness of my efforts will not keep God from taking them and multiplying them a thousand fold or ten thousand fold.
I may be wrong. I will certainly keep asking God to help me overcome my defects of character, my greed, my sloth, my lust, my gluttony, etc., and perhaps God will work miracles in me. I don't believe that God needs my help, I think God wants my help and that's why God created me as I am, foibles and all.
21 March 2011
Fear & Love
"Fear and love are contradictory terms. Love is reckless in giving away, oblivious as to what it gets in return. Love wrestles with the world as with itself and ultimately gains a mastery over all other feelings." - 'From S.S. Rajputana-III' (Letter from M.D.)*, Young India, 1 Oct. 1931 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
Fear, I understand. I am a very fearful person and have always been so from my earliest memories. My father used to tell me that there was nothing to be afraid of. This did not help. It only made me feel bad about myself for being weak.
Today, I still have many fears. I fear financial insecurity, even though I have more than enough money. I fear old age and poor health. I fear losing my wife. I fear losing my daughters, biological and foster. I fear strangers. The list goes on and on.
But I have also begun to learn love. I started to learn in my late teens when I decided that for me the most important thing in the universe were children. Much of my adult life has been spent sharing my life with children. This brings me great joy and great sorrow, but mostly great love. I don't know that I have helped any of them, but I know that they have helped me.
It was this love that brought me to non-violence. It takes but a glance at history to see that the greatest victims of violence and greed have always been children. Followed closely, I might add, by the victimization of women.
A world of non-violence, a world of love, would be a world where the least among us would be raised up as the most important and most valued.
* Mahadev Desai published the above extract from a discours given by Gandhi at the evening prayer, during his voyage to London.
Fear, I understand. I am a very fearful person and have always been so from my earliest memories. My father used to tell me that there was nothing to be afraid of. This did not help. It only made me feel bad about myself for being weak.
Today, I still have many fears. I fear financial insecurity, even though I have more than enough money. I fear old age and poor health. I fear losing my wife. I fear losing my daughters, biological and foster. I fear strangers. The list goes on and on.
But I have also begun to learn love. I started to learn in my late teens when I decided that for me the most important thing in the universe were children. Much of my adult life has been spent sharing my life with children. This brings me great joy and great sorrow, but mostly great love. I don't know that I have helped any of them, but I know that they have helped me.
It was this love that brought me to non-violence. It takes but a glance at history to see that the greatest victims of violence and greed have always been children. Followed closely, I might add, by the victimization of women.
A world of non-violence, a world of love, would be a world where the least among us would be raised up as the most important and most valued.
* Mahadev Desai published the above extract from a discours given by Gandhi at the evening prayer, during his voyage to London.
18 March 2011
Prayer vs. Protest
"The cry for peace will be a cry in the wilderness, so long as the spirit of non-violence does not dominate millions of men and women." - 'Non-Violence -- The Greatest Force,' The Hindu, 8 Nov. 1926 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edit by Raghavan Iyer)
In past weeks, the United States saw large protests from teachers, government workers, and concerned Americans about workers rights to organize and bargain and the slashing of government budgets leading to massive lay-offs of government workers. I participated in one of these protests in my state, Texas, in support of teachers in Wisconsin.
I left this protests, and most of the protests I have ever participated in, feeling empty and sad. I know that I am not the only one who left feeling this way. I spoke to friends who were there. I don't think this is how people should feel when they leave an event like this. There should be energy and excitement. There should be community and hope.
When I read the above essay, I began to understand why I feel this way.
The tactics of non-violence, have become widespread in this country. The spirit of non-violence abides in almost no one.
I have read a number of Dr. Martin Luther King's speeches. I have read John Lewis' book "Walking with the Wind." I have read many more books about non-violence, and yet, I forget that non-violence is not a set of techniques for getting what I want. It is a way of life. A way of being. It is heart and soul and not hand, foot, and tongue.
Prayer is more important than protest.
In past weeks, the United States saw large protests from teachers, government workers, and concerned Americans about workers rights to organize and bargain and the slashing of government budgets leading to massive lay-offs of government workers. I participated in one of these protests in my state, Texas, in support of teachers in Wisconsin.
I left this protests, and most of the protests I have ever participated in, feeling empty and sad. I know that I am not the only one who left feeling this way. I spoke to friends who were there. I don't think this is how people should feel when they leave an event like this. There should be energy and excitement. There should be community and hope.
When I read the above essay, I began to understand why I feel this way.
The tactics of non-violence, have become widespread in this country. The spirit of non-violence abides in almost no one.
I have read a number of Dr. Martin Luther King's speeches. I have read John Lewis' book "Walking with the Wind." I have read many more books about non-violence, and yet, I forget that non-violence is not a set of techniques for getting what I want. It is a way of life. A way of being. It is heart and soul and not hand, foot, and tongue.
Prayer is more important than protest.
17 March 2011
Libya & Egypt
"Non-violence is the law of our species as violence is the law of the brute. The spirit lies dormant in the brute and he knows no law but that of physical might. The dignity of man requires obedience to a higher law - to the strength of the spirit." - 'The Doctrine of the Sword', Young India, 11 Aug. 1920 (from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi edited by Raghavan Iyer)
It is with sadness but no surprise that I watch the brief civil uprising in Libya crumble. When the 'protesters' became 'rebels,' the end was in sight. Gadhafi could claim that he was not killing 'civilians' but 'armed insurgents,' and there is enough truth in that to stymie those who would lend aid.
In Egypt, the protesters struggled with how to react to violence from the government. We watched them struggle and we watched them choose non-violence. This choice opened the heart of the world to the Egyptian people.
The situation in Libya is undoubtedly very different from Egypt. I am certain that many, many unarmed, peaceful people would have died in Libya before Gadhafi gave up power. But many people have still died and many more will die. And which ever side in this civil war wins, my heart will go out to the victims of the fighting on both sides, the women and children caught in the middle, and not the victors. My spirit does not go out to the armed men on either side.
The spirit of humanity versus the spirit of the brute.
It is with sadness but no surprise that I watch the brief civil uprising in Libya crumble. When the 'protesters' became 'rebels,' the end was in sight. Gadhafi could claim that he was not killing 'civilians' but 'armed insurgents,' and there is enough truth in that to stymie those who would lend aid.
In Egypt, the protesters struggled with how to react to violence from the government. We watched them struggle and we watched them choose non-violence. This choice opened the heart of the world to the Egyptian people.
The situation in Libya is undoubtedly very different from Egypt. I am certain that many, many unarmed, peaceful people would have died in Libya before Gadhafi gave up power. But many people have still died and many more will die. And which ever side in this civil war wins, my heart will go out to the victims of the fighting on both sides, the women and children caught in the middle, and not the victors. My spirit does not go out to the armed men on either side.
The spirit of humanity versus the spirit of the brute.
13 March 2011
Faster than a Speeding Bullet
"True humility means most strenuous and constant endeavour entirely directed towards the service of humanity." - Letter to Narandas Gandhi (G.), MMU/I, October 7, 1930
I don't know how to respond to the images on TV of the earthquake and tsunami in Japan. I can give money and I may, and every little bit helps, but I want to be on the ground helping rebuild and that is not possible.
My duties are here with my family and my foster daughters and the struggles in my community to keep the government assisting minorities and the poor.
But these duties seem so mundane.
I dream of taking food and water to the people who's lives have been devastated by natural disaster. I fantasize about being on the front lines of the nonviolent protests in the Middle East. I want to help the children in Africa or India who have no food or clean water or shelter.
But this is not what God has called me to do. God has given me a wife who writes grants for non-profit organizations to help the poor and minorities. God has given me teenage girls who's parents have abandoned them. God has given me a state government, Texas, USA, that is at the bottom in the way it takes care of its children.
And when I remember that I am not a superhero in tights and a cape, what God has called me to do seems very important.
I pray for the people of Japan.
I don't know how to respond to the images on TV of the earthquake and tsunami in Japan. I can give money and I may, and every little bit helps, but I want to be on the ground helping rebuild and that is not possible.
My duties are here with my family and my foster daughters and the struggles in my community to keep the government assisting minorities and the poor.
But these duties seem so mundane.
I dream of taking food and water to the people who's lives have been devastated by natural disaster. I fantasize about being on the front lines of the nonviolent protests in the Middle East. I want to help the children in Africa or India who have no food or clean water or shelter.
But this is not what God has called me to do. God has given me a wife who writes grants for non-profit organizations to help the poor and minorities. God has given me teenage girls who's parents have abandoned them. God has given me a state government, Texas, USA, that is at the bottom in the way it takes care of its children.
And when I remember that I am not a superhero in tights and a cape, what God has called me to do seems very important.
I pray for the people of Japan.
09 March 2011
The Great Undertaking
"I have undertaken to reform a single person, and that is my own self. And I realize how difficult it is to reform him." - A Letter to Adamsaleh A. Patel (G.), SN 19901, April 14, 1926
What can I add?
Amen.
What can I add?
Amen.
08 March 2011
"I Ever Compromise My Own Ideals"
"Achara means the outward mode of living and it can change from time to time. The rules of inner living must remain the same; that is, one should cling to truth, ahimsa, etc. In trying to follow them, we may change the rules of outward mode of living whenever necessary." A Letter (G.), Mahadevbhaini Diary, Vol. I, p. 364
When I first read Gandhi many years ago, one of the first changes I made was to give up my car and begin riding my bicycle for transportation. I felt then, and I still feel today, that in the United States, transportation by automobile is a form of violence. We fight wars for oil for our cars. Tens of thousands are killed on our highways, and hundreds of thousands are injured annually. Our transportation system sub-divides neighbor from neighbor with dead zones of blacktop. Money that could be spent helping the least among us is spent paving paradise and chrome plates our lives. More can be added to the list.
For ten years my wife and I lived without a car. We cycled everywhere we went. To choose this life in an American city means sacrifices. Our daily lives were circumscribed by our limited method of transportation. We were happy with these limits for many years.
And then my life turned in a different direction. My daughter found out she had a medical condition that precluded her from having children. For many years I have worked with teenagers. The prospect of no grandchildren made us rethink our lives. We decided to become foster parents. Teenage girls began to come and live in our home. The foster care system requires trips to family court, to doctors, to therapists, to various and sundry meetings most of which were not in our city, and teenage girls have needs for social lives that are not local. Being without a car was no longer an option.
We own two now. The truth of sharing our home with children without homes has supplanted the truth of not owning a car. I still try and ride my bicycle to the local store and any nearby meetings, but my life now revolves around my girls and not my transportation.
Do I have mixed feelings about this? Of course, but I am comfortable in this decision. It's not perfect. I have had to compromise, but I can live with the compromise.
When I first read Gandhi many years ago, one of the first changes I made was to give up my car and begin riding my bicycle for transportation. I felt then, and I still feel today, that in the United States, transportation by automobile is a form of violence. We fight wars for oil for our cars. Tens of thousands are killed on our highways, and hundreds of thousands are injured annually. Our transportation system sub-divides neighbor from neighbor with dead zones of blacktop. Money that could be spent helping the least among us is spent paving paradise and chrome plates our lives. More can be added to the list.
For ten years my wife and I lived without a car. We cycled everywhere we went. To choose this life in an American city means sacrifices. Our daily lives were circumscribed by our limited method of transportation. We were happy with these limits for many years.
And then my life turned in a different direction. My daughter found out she had a medical condition that precluded her from having children. For many years I have worked with teenagers. The prospect of no grandchildren made us rethink our lives. We decided to become foster parents. Teenage girls began to come and live in our home. The foster care system requires trips to family court, to doctors, to therapists, to various and sundry meetings most of which were not in our city, and teenage girls have needs for social lives that are not local. Being without a car was no longer an option.
We own two now. The truth of sharing our home with children without homes has supplanted the truth of not owning a car. I still try and ride my bicycle to the local store and any nearby meetings, but my life now revolves around my girls and not my transportation.
Do I have mixed feelings about this? Of course, but I am comfortable in this decision. It's not perfect. I have had to compromise, but I can live with the compromise.
07 March 2011
Gratitude List
"It is our actions which count. Thoughts, however good in themselves, are like false pearls unless they are translated into action." A Letter (G.), Mahadevbhaini Diary, Vol. II, p. 15
I am basically a lazy person. I love television and computer games. As a writer, I can delude myself into thinking I am 'doing something' when actually all that I am accomplishing is wasting time.
I'm not even sure that little projects like this blog count as 'doing something,' even though I pat myself on the back every time I post and tick off as something accomplished on my to-do list.
When I am 'doing something,' I often feeling as though I am flailing about. "When in danger or in doubt, run in circles, scream, and shout."
But then I stop and count my blessing, make a gratitude list:
And I am inspired to get back to work.
I am basically a lazy person. I love television and computer games. As a writer, I can delude myself into thinking I am 'doing something' when actually all that I am accomplishing is wasting time.
I'm not even sure that little projects like this blog count as 'doing something,' even though I pat myself on the back every time I post and tick off as something accomplished on my to-do list.
When I am 'doing something,' I often feeling as though I am flailing about. "When in danger or in doubt, run in circles, scream, and shout."
But then I stop and count my blessing, make a gratitude list:
- My family and I are healthy.
- There is food in the refrigerator.
- There is a roof over our head.
- There is more than enough money.
- I have people who love me.
- I have friends who like me.
- I have more than enough work to keep me busy even if I don't always know exactly what my priorities are.
- I live in country where I am not persecuted for what I believe or what I say or how I dress or much of anything that isn't destructive or harmful.
- I have happy memories and little mementos that remind me of many of those memories.
- I have leisure time to study or meditate or just relax.
And I am inspired to get back to work.
06 March 2011
Progress not Perfection
"Faith is not a thing to grasp, it is a state to grow to. And growth comes from within." - A Letter, Mahadev Desai's Diary (MSS), 3 May 1935
I am not a deep spiritual person. My mother used to say, "Deep down inside, I'm really very shallow," and I believe that describes me. I don't have strong convictions and even though I pray regularly and meditate often, I rarely feel in touch with the Great Spirit, a power greater than myself, God, the creator, or whatever of the thousand names you prefer.
And I don't worry about that. I know that my feelings are all on the inside and have nothing to do with what's really going on in the universe (and by universe, I do not mean what physicists mean by 'universe.' I mean everything, whatever that means.)
My feelings are not what are important. My actions are what are important. "Simplicity, service, living so as not to hurt others," to quote Gandhi.
I try and practice a simple faith by doing what other spiritual people do and I leave the outcome up to God.
I am not a deep spiritual person. My mother used to say, "Deep down inside, I'm really very shallow," and I believe that describes me. I don't have strong convictions and even though I pray regularly and meditate often, I rarely feel in touch with the Great Spirit, a power greater than myself, God, the creator, or whatever of the thousand names you prefer.
And I don't worry about that. I know that my feelings are all on the inside and have nothing to do with what's really going on in the universe (and by universe, I do not mean what physicists mean by 'universe.' I mean everything, whatever that means.)
My feelings are not what are important. My actions are what are important. "Simplicity, service, living so as not to hurt others," to quote Gandhi.
I try and practice a simple faith by doing what other spiritual people do and I leave the outcome up to God.
03 March 2011
A Quack like Me
"The optimist lives delighting in thoughts of love and charity...The pessimist, being himself prey to violent attachments and dislikes, looks upon every person as his enemy..." - 'Optimism' (G.), Navajivan, 23 Oct 1921
My wife has told me often over the years that when ever we talk about the future, I always see the bad things that can happen and never the good, and I believe she is telling me the truth.. It is a hard thing for me to hear.
I want to believe that I am an optimist, but that is not the truth. I live in fear. I seem to have been that way as long as I can remember.
When I was a boy and would tell my father that I was afraid, he would look at me sternly and tell me there was nothing to be afraid of.
My father had a difficult upbringing. His mother was married either seven or nine times, he wasn't sure which. At the age of sixteen, he beat up his then current step-father and went to live in the oil fields of California with his real father, working for him on his wild-cat oil rigs. At seventeen, he joined the Navy and was in port in Pearl Harbor on Dec. 7, 1941. His first ship was sunk there. Two more ships he was on during the war were sunk in the Pacific. I don't think he could ever let himself feel scared and he didn't want his son to be fearful. But I was, and I felt like I was a failure. I was never the son my father wanted. He wanted a man's man. I was far more comfortable with women.
In recent years, I have begun to accept that I am a fearful person. I don't like it, but I have stopped trying to change this fact about myself. It is not in my power to change. However, what is in my power to change is how I react to my fears.
I pray for courage.
My wife has told me often over the years that when ever we talk about the future, I always see the bad things that can happen and never the good, and I believe she is telling me the truth.. It is a hard thing for me to hear.
I want to believe that I am an optimist, but that is not the truth. I live in fear. I seem to have been that way as long as I can remember.
When I was a boy and would tell my father that I was afraid, he would look at me sternly and tell me there was nothing to be afraid of.
My father had a difficult upbringing. His mother was married either seven or nine times, he wasn't sure which. At the age of sixteen, he beat up his then current step-father and went to live in the oil fields of California with his real father, working for him on his wild-cat oil rigs. At seventeen, he joined the Navy and was in port in Pearl Harbor on Dec. 7, 1941. His first ship was sunk there. Two more ships he was on during the war were sunk in the Pacific. I don't think he could ever let himself feel scared and he didn't want his son to be fearful. But I was, and I felt like I was a failure. I was never the son my father wanted. He wanted a man's man. I was far more comfortable with women.
In recent years, I have begun to accept that I am a fearful person. I don't like it, but I have stopped trying to change this fact about myself. It is not in my power to change. However, what is in my power to change is how I react to my fears.
I pray for courage.
02 March 2011
Smarter than a Fifth Grader
"Intellect takes us along in the battle of life to a certain limit but at the crucial moment it fails us. Faith transcends reason. It is when the horizon is the darkest and human reason is beaten down to the ground that faith shines brightest and comes to our rescue." Interview with Dr. John Mott, Young India, 21 Mar. 1929
Exactly which ape is closest to us evolutionarily is a question I am not well educated enough to answer, but that some ape is our evolutionary ancestor, I accept. Since I decided to believe in a higher power many, many years ago, I decided I wasn't going to believe in a God that played tricks, ergo, fossils are what they appear to be, evidence of life on this planet that is billions of years old, and evolution is the best theory for how humans got here. For me, it doesn't diminish the miracle of human life, but enhances it.
I believe we are descended from the apes. How smart is the average chimpanzee?
If apes are our nearest evolutionary ancestors, how bright can we be? 'Intellect takes us along in the battle of life to a certain limit,' and, for me anyway, that limit is a very, very short leash. I'm like a dog chained to a tree. Too often, I run around and around the tree shortening what little leash I have and then stand there howling and barking because I can't figure out how to unwrap myself.
I have struggled for years to fix my worst character defects. Plotting, planning, fighting, conniving, tricking myself into trying to do what I think is right and important, and the results have been utter failure.
When I let go and let God, my life changes for the better.
I can't.
God can.
I think I'll let God.
Exactly which ape is closest to us evolutionarily is a question I am not well educated enough to answer, but that some ape is our evolutionary ancestor, I accept. Since I decided to believe in a higher power many, many years ago, I decided I wasn't going to believe in a God that played tricks, ergo, fossils are what they appear to be, evidence of life on this planet that is billions of years old, and evolution is the best theory for how humans got here. For me, it doesn't diminish the miracle of human life, but enhances it.
I believe we are descended from the apes. How smart is the average chimpanzee?
If apes are our nearest evolutionary ancestors, how bright can we be? 'Intellect takes us along in the battle of life to a certain limit,' and, for me anyway, that limit is a very, very short leash. I'm like a dog chained to a tree. Too often, I run around and around the tree shortening what little leash I have and then stand there howling and barking because I can't figure out how to unwrap myself.
I have struggled for years to fix my worst character defects. Plotting, planning, fighting, conniving, tricking myself into trying to do what I think is right and important, and the results have been utter failure.
When I let go and let God, my life changes for the better.
I can't.
God can.
I think I'll let God.
01 March 2011
The Contribution of Non-Violence
"Dr. Mott: 'What do you consider to be the most valuable contribution that India can make to the progress of the world?
Gandhi: Non-Violence." - Interview with Dr. John Mott, Young India, 21 Mar. 1929
And what a valuable contribution it has been. Gaddafi condemned and sanctioned for killing peaceful civilians. The amazing video of the lone man standing up to the tanks in Tiananmen. Rosa Parks and lunch counters and the Edmund Pettus Bridge. Draft card burners. Labor unionists occupying the Wisconsin State Capital.
The list goes on and on.
And in my own life, my wife and I ride our bicycles for ten years and don't own a car. We decide to become foster parents. I write scripts and novels and poetry that emphasis non-violent methods for resolving problems. (They don't sell, but that's a whole different can of worms.)
I know in these blogs, I have often written about my failings (and they are legion), but there are many, many successes.
And that's why I started and continue this blog. It is one of my daily disciplines to help me remember what is important in my life today. I consider it prayer.
Gandhi: Non-Violence." - Interview with Dr. John Mott, Young India, 21 Mar. 1929
And what a valuable contribution it has been. Gaddafi condemned and sanctioned for killing peaceful civilians. The amazing video of the lone man standing up to the tanks in Tiananmen. Rosa Parks and lunch counters and the Edmund Pettus Bridge. Draft card burners. Labor unionists occupying the Wisconsin State Capital.
The list goes on and on.
And in my own life, my wife and I ride our bicycles for ten years and don't own a car. We decide to become foster parents. I write scripts and novels and poetry that emphasis non-violent methods for resolving problems. (They don't sell, but that's a whole different can of worms.)
I know in these blogs, I have often written about my failings (and they are legion), but there are many, many successes.
And that's why I started and continue this blog. It is one of my daily disciplines to help me remember what is important in my life today. I consider it prayer.
27 February 2011
What Would Jesus Cut?
"If evolution of form takes aeons, why should we expect wonders in the evolution of thought and conduct? And yet the age of miracles is not gone. As with individuals, so with nations. I hold it to be perfectly possible for the masses to be suddenly converted and uplifted. Suddenness is only seeming. No one can say how far the leaven has been working." Speech at Buddha Jayanti, Bombay, CW 5176
I went to the first protest rally I'd been to in many years yesterday. I chanted. I sang. I talked to friends. I listened to speeches. I took pictures.
There were a lot of angry people. There was a lot of sarcasm and demonization of others. There was a lot of talk of fighting.
There were also moments of grace. There were moments of warmth and humor. There were moments of a spiritual connections with others who struggled and with God.
I've had a theory for many years that the next evolution in Homo sapien would not be spiritual and not physical, Homo anima. I found the quoted passage in Gandhi's speech reassuring.
The only visible sign of a presence by the forces of authority were a couple of friendly cops on bicycle. Gandhi's and Dr. King's methods of non-violent protest have become the norm. The crowds are no longer physically threatening even if they might be politically threatening.
And it's not just here in America as several signs reminded the protesters. "Walk like an Egyptian."
Perhaps the next evolution is upon us. Miracles happen.
I went to the first protest rally I'd been to in many years yesterday. I chanted. I sang. I talked to friends. I listened to speeches. I took pictures.
There were a lot of angry people. There was a lot of sarcasm and demonization of others. There was a lot of talk of fighting.
There were also moments of grace. There were moments of warmth and humor. There were moments of a spiritual connections with others who struggled and with God.
I've had a theory for many years that the next evolution in Homo sapien would not be spiritual and not physical, Homo anima. I found the quoted passage in Gandhi's speech reassuring.
The only visible sign of a presence by the forces of authority were a couple of friendly cops on bicycle. Gandhi's and Dr. King's methods of non-violent protest have become the norm. The crowds are no longer physically threatening even if they might be politically threatening.
And it's not just here in America as several signs reminded the protesters. "Walk like an Egyptian."
Perhaps the next evolution is upon us. Miracles happen.
25 February 2011
Difficult Times
"These are difficult times. If all want power who will render silent service?" Notes to Baba Raghavdas (H.), Hindustan, 16 Apr. 1946
This morning I did the dishes, kissed my wife, took the girls to school. I realized that I needed to find some way to give each a morning affirmation before the pain and boredom of their daily grind was fully upon them. They are so weary, broken, and angry before their days in class. It's hard to watch them get out of the car and drag themselves toward the entrance. It makes me sad.
I planned dinner for friends tonight and shopped. I cleaned the girl's bathroom so that our guests would not know what slobs we are.
I checked my email.
I listened to the latest news from Libya. I wonder if I could stand, non-violently, when a madman's thugs show up with machine guns to kill all who protest against him.
And if a man broke into my house to rape my daughters, or kill my wife, or just to steal my TV, what would I do?
I'm glad these are not decisions I have to make today. I'm glad my choices are cleaning floors, and cooking meals, and having lunch with a friend.
Difficult times, indeed.
This morning I did the dishes, kissed my wife, took the girls to school. I realized that I needed to find some way to give each a morning affirmation before the pain and boredom of their daily grind was fully upon them. They are so weary, broken, and angry before their days in class. It's hard to watch them get out of the car and drag themselves toward the entrance. It makes me sad.
I planned dinner for friends tonight and shopped. I cleaned the girl's bathroom so that our guests would not know what slobs we are.
I checked my email.
I listened to the latest news from Libya. I wonder if I could stand, non-violently, when a madman's thugs show up with machine guns to kill all who protest against him.
And if a man broke into my house to rape my daughters, or kill my wife, or just to steal my TV, what would I do?
I'm glad these are not decisions I have to make today. I'm glad my choices are cleaning floors, and cooking meals, and having lunch with a friend.
Difficult times, indeed.
24 February 2011
The Beginning of My Understanding
"That is why I can take the keenest interest in discussing vitamins and leafy vegetables and unpolished rice. That is why it has become a matter of absorbing interest to me to find out how best to clean our latrines, how best to save our people from the heinous sin of fouling Mother Earth every morning. I do not quite see how thinking of these necessary problems and finding a solution for them has no political significance and how an examination of the financial policy of Government has necessarily a political bearing." - 'A Fatal Fallacy,' Harijan, 11 Jan. 1936
I believe this is the statement that began my understanding of Gandhi.
I am not a political creature. I know that many of you are.
The grand scheme of things is not my focus. The dark and dirty corners of my life are.
I have organized and lead mass protests, but the energy and time I spent doing so were not as valuable as the time I spend each morning doing my dishes. Even if the results of the protest were positive and productive, my own household clean and well organized, living a life of service to my family and friends, helping those around me who struggle to joyously accomplish the very valuable day to day tasks that we are all faced with, brings me closer to an understanding of what God is calling me to do.
When I read about Gandhi's vision of non-attachment to the things of the world, I begin to understand when I think about all the things I am responsible for maintaining in my family's life. Simply keeping that much stuff clean often seems like a nearly overwhelming burden. Less stuff means more time to contemplate my navel and less time sweeping the floor.
But this is what I have been given, right now. And least you misunderstand me, I love driving my kids to school, and picking up the trash they leave in the living room, and cooking the meals even when they hate what I have cooked and dig into the pantry for the Hot Cheetos®.
21 February 2011
I Voted for Richard Nixon, pt. 2
"The stench that comes from that life (politics) has appeared to some to be so suffocating that they came to the conclusion that politics were not for a god-fearing man." Speech at Guildhouse Church, under the auspices of the Franciscan Society, The Guildhouse, 23 Sept. 1931
Not that I'm a god-fearing man (sometimes I am and sometimes I'm not), but the stench does appear to be suffocating.
Even if I ignore the creeps and crumb-bums and ignoramuses who go into politics in this country, even if I ignore present day political policies designed to ensure that tens of thousands of Americans die from automobiles, junk food, toxic air and water, etc., even if I ignore the money that has always swamped our political system and now threatens to drown us all, I can't ignore the guns and bombs.
I have a marksman's medal awarded by the U.S. government for shooting an M-16. I loaded a live nuclear bomb on my airplane in a revetment in Germany, strapped in the pilots, taxied it out, and saluted the end of the world.
My first vote was for a crook, a criminal. My last vote (Barack Obama) was for (sigh) just another politician.
But I have hope that things can change.
Not that I'm a god-fearing man (sometimes I am and sometimes I'm not), but the stench does appear to be suffocating.
Even if I ignore the creeps and crumb-bums and ignoramuses who go into politics in this country, even if I ignore present day political policies designed to ensure that tens of thousands of Americans die from automobiles, junk food, toxic air and water, etc., even if I ignore the money that has always swamped our political system and now threatens to drown us all, I can't ignore the guns and bombs.
I have a marksman's medal awarded by the U.S. government for shooting an M-16. I loaded a live nuclear bomb on my airplane in a revetment in Germany, strapped in the pilots, taxied it out, and saluted the end of the world.
My first vote was for a crook, a criminal. My last vote (Barack Obama) was for (sigh) just another politician.
But I have hope that things can change.
19 February 2011
I Voted for Richard Nixon, pt. 1
"My bent is not political but religious and I take part in politics because I feel that there is no department of life which can be divorced from religion and because politics touch the vital being of India almost at every point" Letter to G.S. Arundale, Young India, 6 Aug. 1919
In 1972, having just left home to go to college, I registered and voted for Milhouse. My father was a dyed in the wool Republican and I respected and feared my father. I was afraid of everything. Voting Republican was an attempt to put up a bulwark against fear.
After this election, I fell in with a bad crowd - bridge players. I spent the four years learning the finer points of how to squeeze RHO to unblock his queen of hearts. I lost track of politics.
Then came the military and politics had a new urgency for me. Politic decisions affected my paycheck. Political decisions could end my life. An bent winged bug sucker (F-4E Phantom) with my name spray painted on the cockpit could fly away with a nuclear bomb to help end the world. I had a baby girl.
My views changed. Unfortunately, politics in America had not.
I just couldn't vote for Defense Policies that had the end of the world as a backup plan and Republican or Democrat, that was and remains our country's fall back position.
In 1972, having just left home to go to college, I registered and voted for Milhouse. My father was a dyed in the wool Republican and I respected and feared my father. I was afraid of everything. Voting Republican was an attempt to put up a bulwark against fear.
After this election, I fell in with a bad crowd - bridge players. I spent the four years learning the finer points of how to squeeze RHO to unblock his queen of hearts. I lost track of politics.
Then came the military and politics had a new urgency for me. Politic decisions affected my paycheck. Political decisions could end my life. An bent winged bug sucker (F-4E Phantom) with my name spray painted on the cockpit could fly away with a nuclear bomb to help end the world. I had a baby girl.
My views changed. Unfortunately, politics in America had not.
A young Englishman (yes, that Dudley Moore) is talking to a friend about his upcoming visit to America:
“Paxton Whitehead: They (the United States) have inherited our two party system.
Dudley Moore: How does that work?
Paxton Whitehead: Oh, well, they have the Republican Party which is the equivalent of our Conservative Party, and they have the Democratic Party which is the equivalent of our Conservative Party.” – Beyond the Fringe, 1962
I just couldn't vote for Defense Policies that had the end of the world as a backup plan and Republican or Democrat, that was and remains our country's fall back position.
18 February 2011
Quibbling
"Our besetting sin is not our differences but our littleness. We wrangle over words, we fight often for shadow and lose the substance." Letter to G.S. Arundale, Young India, 6 Aug. 1919
I'm afraid anything I say will only muddle or obscure this simple analysis of what besets modern politics, modern life.
I'm afraid anything I say will only muddle or obscure this simple analysis of what besets modern politics, modern life.
17 February 2011
Egypt
"I think political life should be an echo of private life and that there cannot be any divorce between the two." Speech at Government High School, Bangalore, 1915
A friend said I must have lots of things to say about what is happening today in Egypt and the Middle East and the non-violent uprisings going on.
I don't.
I don't know enough even though I have been to Egypt in the past five years and spoke to many citizens about many things. Even though I have close friends who have live in Cairo for, at least, the last 10 years.
I don't know what the poor and the working class struggle with on a day to day basis. I don't know how the police behave during a routine traffic stop. I don't understand what role religion plays in people's lives. I don't have to buy groceries or drive across town or pay taxes or serve in the military.
And I know very little about non-violence.
I know there is a difference between choosing non-violence and just not having the guns to demand what you want.
16 February 2011
Our Hybrid Lives
"I saw in the recitation, the beautiful recitation that was given to me, that God is with them whose garment was dusty and tattered. My thoughts immediately went to the end of my garment; I examined and found that it is not dusty and it is not tattered; it is fairly spotless and clean. God is not in me." Speech at Government High School, Bangalore, 1915
I'm a recycler. Yea, I put stuff in the can on the curb to avoid the dump, but I that's only a small, and I think insignificant, part.
My mother's mother died thirty or more years ago. My wife and I were recently married. We were poor and had little furniture. More than a bit of the furniture in my grandmother's home was shipped to us. We still use most of what we received then in our current home. Bookshelves, bed frames, a table, lamps, stuff I've forgotten belonged to her. I cherish this stuff.
My desk and my desk chair were bought second hand. I have my old desk, also bought second hand, in the garage.
I collect not just my old photos, but the old photos from my family and my wife's family.
I buy a lot of my clothes second hand.
We have used cars and furniture collected from family and friends. We have old dishes and old mismatched silverware and pots and pans and serving platters collected from family.
It's not that I hate wasting stuff. I do, but that's not it.
I know this will sound new agey. Yuck...
But I love going to the old places in old cities. I feel like I can feel all the people that have lived there. It's not like I see ghosts or can feel 'old Mrs. Grundy's' spirit, but these places have an energy for me. There's a heart beat, a soul in these places.
My tatters come second hand. I choose tatters. I don't earn tatters.
God is not in me. But I have decided to choose God.
(Title from Chances Are by Sheryl Crow. One of my favorite songs.)
I'm a recycler. Yea, I put stuff in the can on the curb to avoid the dump, but I that's only a small, and I think insignificant, part.
My mother's mother died thirty or more years ago. My wife and I were recently married. We were poor and had little furniture. More than a bit of the furniture in my grandmother's home was shipped to us. We still use most of what we received then in our current home. Bookshelves, bed frames, a table, lamps, stuff I've forgotten belonged to her. I cherish this stuff.
My desk and my desk chair were bought second hand. I have my old desk, also bought second hand, in the garage.
I collect not just my old photos, but the old photos from my family and my wife's family.
I buy a lot of my clothes second hand.
We have used cars and furniture collected from family and friends. We have old dishes and old mismatched silverware and pots and pans and serving platters collected from family.
It's not that I hate wasting stuff. I do, but that's not it.
I know this will sound new agey. Yuck...
But I love going to the old places in old cities. I feel like I can feel all the people that have lived there. It's not like I see ghosts or can feel 'old Mrs. Grundy's' spirit, but these places have an energy for me. There's a heart beat, a soul in these places.
My tatters come second hand. I choose tatters. I don't earn tatters.
God is not in me. But I have decided to choose God.
(Title from Chances Are by Sheryl Crow. One of my favorite songs.)
15 February 2011
Maladjusted
"...there are some things in our social system to which all of us ought to be maladjusted... It may be that the salvation of the world lies in the hands of the maladjusted." Dr. Martin Luther King
The temptation to anger about...our political system, the environment, the economy, the starving millions, the way we treat animals, the war...the list is endless, leads generally to only to one of two things. Violence - lashing out at the perceived institution responsible for the injustice, and make no mistake, these are injustices. O inertia, apathy, at the size and number of things that need to be fixed in this world.
Most of us choose apathy.
Oh, we recycle or become vegetarians or vote or use energy-saving light bulbs or stop wearing fur, small gestures that soothe our conscience, but have little effect on our actual ways of living.
Don't get me wrong - these things are better than nothing.
But...How many of us are willing to stop driving? How many of us are willing to stop paying taxes? Hell, how many of us are willing to stop voting Democratic or Republican and look for an alternative to these two sad sacks.
I am not maladjusted. I drive. I pay my taxes. I eat meat. I have stopped voting for either of the two parties, but I put no money or time into the effort to make a third party viable.
I want to be maladjusted.
The temptation to anger about...our political system, the environment, the economy, the starving millions, the way we treat animals, the war...the list is endless, leads generally to only to one of two things. Violence - lashing out at the perceived institution responsible for the injustice, and make no mistake, these are injustices. O inertia, apathy, at the size and number of things that need to be fixed in this world.
Most of us choose apathy.
Oh, we recycle or become vegetarians or vote or use energy-saving light bulbs or stop wearing fur, small gestures that soothe our conscience, but have little effect on our actual ways of living.
Don't get me wrong - these things are better than nothing.
But...How many of us are willing to stop driving? How many of us are willing to stop paying taxes? Hell, how many of us are willing to stop voting Democratic or Republican and look for an alternative to these two sad sacks.
I am not maladjusted. I drive. I pay my taxes. I eat meat. I have stopped voting for either of the two parties, but I put no money or time into the effort to make a third party viable.
I want to be maladjusted.
11 February 2011
Collateral Damage
"We should understand that the less violence a religion permits, the more is the truth it contained in it." The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi, edited by Raghavan Iyer, p 103
Translations of the Bible vary on what exactly is meant by the Sixth Commandment. Many scholars say that the intent was not "thou shall not kill," but rather, "thou shall not murder." The difference makes killing in self-defense or defense of kingdom or kin acceptable.
Faced with the choice of killing or being killed, I don't know how I would react. If someone attacked my wife or daughters, I would defend them. I would like to think that if a neighbor was attacked I would go to their aid. But what of a total stranger?
And what kind of aid would I provide? What kind of defense would I put up? I don't own a gun, but their is a baseball bat next to my bed and on more than one occasion when a noise has waked me in the night, I have taken it with me when I investigated.
And then there is the whole question of the food I eat? Is it murder to eat a steak for dinner? I know that I didn't kill the cow, but the cow died for my sins. I'm trying to reduce the meat I eat, but I'm not vegetarian yet.
But what if the commandment really is "thou shall not kill?" I don't see any 'if, ands, or buts' in that statement.
My money supports the killing of thousands in far away lands. People who intend no harm to me, my kin, and my country . Women and children caught in the crossfire. I am responsible for their deaths. Directly responsible.
Translations of the Bible vary on what exactly is meant by the Sixth Commandment. Many scholars say that the intent was not "thou shall not kill," but rather, "thou shall not murder." The difference makes killing in self-defense or defense of kingdom or kin acceptable.
Faced with the choice of killing or being killed, I don't know how I would react. If someone attacked my wife or daughters, I would defend them. I would like to think that if a neighbor was attacked I would go to their aid. But what of a total stranger?
And what kind of aid would I provide? What kind of defense would I put up? I don't own a gun, but their is a baseball bat next to my bed and on more than one occasion when a noise has waked me in the night, I have taken it with me when I investigated.
And then there is the whole question of the food I eat? Is it murder to eat a steak for dinner? I know that I didn't kill the cow, but the cow died for my sins. I'm trying to reduce the meat I eat, but I'm not vegetarian yet.
But what if the commandment really is "thou shall not kill?" I don't see any 'if, ands, or buts' in that statement.
My money supports the killing of thousands in far away lands. People who intend no harm to me, my kin, and my country . Women and children caught in the crossfire. I am responsible for their deaths. Directly responsible.
10 February 2011
Lucky Man
"(Modern Civilization's) greatest achievements are the invention of the most terrible weapons of destruction, the awful growth of anarchism, the frightful disputes between capital and labour and the wanton and diabolical cruelty inflicted on innocent, dumb, living animals in the name of science..." The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi, edited by Raghavan Iyer, p. 83
I am a lucky man. I don't have to think about these things if I don't want to. I can indulge myself with wonderful food, mass entertainment, and tons of stuff to make my life easier, softer.
And I do.
http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/373116/february-07-2011/exclusive---the-seven-deadly-sins---gluttony-mash-up
FYKSYAR4G3GH
I am a lucky man. I don't have to think about these things if I don't want to. I can indulge myself with wonderful food, mass entertainment, and tons of stuff to make my life easier, softer.
And I do.
http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/373116/february-07-2011/exclusive---the-seven-deadly-sins---gluttony-mash-up
FYKSYAR4G3GH
07 February 2011
Freedom from Attachment
My Mother-in-Law, Jean, died last week after a long slow deterioration. There was sadness and relief in her finally letting go. The burdens of life had been set down and whatever is beyond accepted.
Jean spent years letting go of the many things that cluttered the life of a upper-middle class mother and wife. She gave away many of the things she loved to family and friends. When she died there was not much left to deal with. Odds and ends.
My life is buried in the things I own. The amount of time I spend cleaning and organizing the things of my life comes close to exceeding the times I actually "use" those things. If I was actually a well organized person rather than a slob, keeping track of my things might take more time than the time I spend putting the things to use.
And it's more than I just using these things for some apparently valued purpose, I have an attachment to these things. I like my things. I invest some part of myself in my plastic coffee filter holder that I have used for years to make coffee every morning.
How does this happen? Why is a part of my soul owned by an old copy of Cyrano de Bergerac and my TV remote and a teeny tiny bottle of olive oil I bought in a Paris shop filled with sand I collected from the Egyptian desert?
I don't want freedom from these things. I'm not sure I agree with Gandhi on this subject. There is something sacred in some of these things.
Jean spent years letting go of the many things that cluttered the life of a upper-middle class mother and wife. She gave away many of the things she loved to family and friends. When she died there was not much left to deal with. Odds and ends.
My life is buried in the things I own. The amount of time I spend cleaning and organizing the things of my life comes close to exceeding the times I actually "use" those things. If I was actually a well organized person rather than a slob, keeping track of my things might take more time than the time I spend putting the things to use.
And it's more than I just using these things for some apparently valued purpose, I have an attachment to these things. I like my things. I invest some part of myself in my plastic coffee filter holder that I have used for years to make coffee every morning.
How does this happen? Why is a part of my soul owned by an old copy of Cyrano de Bergerac and my TV remote and a teeny tiny bottle of olive oil I bought in a Paris shop filled with sand I collected from the Egyptian desert?
I don't want freedom from these things. I'm not sure I agree with Gandhi on this subject. There is something sacred in some of these things.
02 February 2011
"Kicking the tires and lightin' the fires"
"My patriotism is all-embracing and I should reject that patriotism which sought to mount upon the distress or the exploitation of other nationalities." Speech at a Public Meeting, Rangoon, 9 March 1929
I wrote in my very first blog post that I was a veteran. I am a veteran because Ronald Reagan made all Cold-War military personnel veterans and I am thankful for that. I have a VA loan on my house. Tomorrow, I go for my first orientation and examination at a local VA clinic.
Despite President Reagan, I did not fight in any war. We were at peace. The Soviet Union was collapsing. My service was six years of repairing and launching an ancient, but stalwart aircraft on a daily basis, practicing for the end of the world.
The Air Force taught me a lot and I am proud to have served.
Does that make me a patriot?
I feel lucky to live in the United States of America.
I am rich beyond much of the world's wildest dreams.
I have leisure to contemplate and write about philosophy.
I have choices about how I live my life.
Survival is not my top priority.
I vote. I vote relatively faithfully. Except for Obama, I have voted Green Party since 1984. I voted for Obama so that every African-American child could have the same dreams as every other child in America, not because I believed he would bring something new to the White House. I will go back to voting Green Party. I remind my fellow Democrats and Republicans that "One definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result."
I am sad for my country. Given a great gift, we squander it. We mount upon the distress of other nations. We exploit other nationalities.
We invest our treasure in guns and we reap the interest from our investment.
Am I a patriot?
I wrote in my very first blog post that I was a veteran. I am a veteran because Ronald Reagan made all Cold-War military personnel veterans and I am thankful for that. I have a VA loan on my house. Tomorrow, I go for my first orientation and examination at a local VA clinic.
Despite President Reagan, I did not fight in any war. We were at peace. The Soviet Union was collapsing. My service was six years of repairing and launching an ancient, but stalwart aircraft on a daily basis, practicing for the end of the world.
The Air Force taught me a lot and I am proud to have served.
Does that make me a patriot?
I feel lucky to live in the United States of America.
I am rich beyond much of the world's wildest dreams.
I have leisure to contemplate and write about philosophy.
I have choices about how I live my life.
Survival is not my top priority.
I vote. I vote relatively faithfully. Except for Obama, I have voted Green Party since 1984. I voted for Obama so that every African-American child could have the same dreams as every other child in America, not because I believed he would bring something new to the White House. I will go back to voting Green Party. I remind my fellow Democrats and Republicans that "One definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result."
I am sad for my country. Given a great gift, we squander it. We mount upon the distress of other nations. We exploit other nationalities.
We invest our treasure in guns and we reap the interest from our investment.
Am I a patriot?
01 February 2011
Would Jesus Drive?
"Living so as not to hurt others"
In July 2002, a small, now defunct, magazine called "The Other Side" published an article I wrote which I titled with the above question. "The Other Side" was a left wing Christian magazine similar, if slightly more radical than, "Sojourners". They did little editing to the original article except to change the title. I guess they felt that "Would Jesus Drive?" was too in the face of their readership.
The thesis of the article was that driving an automobile was an act of violence. Even though I now drive daily, my beliefs haven't changed.
Ninety three (93) people a day are killed on our nations roads every day. The number injured is probably ten times that high and many of those injuries are life changing. And how many billions of dollars do we spend on new cars, upkeep, infrastructure, not to mention gasoline.
Our neighborhoods are chopped up by black dead zones, strips unsafe for life of any kind.
Exhaust from our cars is changing the atmosphere. Mass extinctions are taking place all over the globe.
And then there are the oil wars.
So how do I "justify" driving? Foster daughters. Living in a moderately sized city with children, it is impossible to give them what they need without a car. I knew that in 2002 when I wrote the article. We have designed our cities to make life without a car extremely difficult even for people who don't have children.
Does the good out-weight the bad? I like to think so, but...
In July 2002, a small, now defunct, magazine called "The Other Side" published an article I wrote which I titled with the above question. "The Other Side" was a left wing Christian magazine similar, if slightly more radical than, "Sojourners". They did little editing to the original article except to change the title. I guess they felt that "Would Jesus Drive?" was too in the face of their readership.
The thesis of the article was that driving an automobile was an act of violence. Even though I now drive daily, my beliefs haven't changed.
Ninety three (93) people a day are killed on our nations roads every day. The number injured is probably ten times that high and many of those injuries are life changing. And how many billions of dollars do we spend on new cars, upkeep, infrastructure, not to mention gasoline.
Our neighborhoods are chopped up by black dead zones, strips unsafe for life of any kind.
Exhaust from our cars is changing the atmosphere. Mass extinctions are taking place all over the globe.
And then there are the oil wars.
So how do I "justify" driving? Foster daughters. Living in a moderately sized city with children, it is impossible to give them what they need without a car. I knew that in 2002 when I wrote the article. We have designed our cities to make life without a car extremely difficult even for people who don't have children.
Does the good out-weight the bad? I like to think so, but...
31 January 2011
The Message of the Spinning-Wheel
"It's message is one of simplicity, service of mankind, living so as not to hurt others..." - 'To American Friends,' Young India, 17 Sept. 1925
For most of his life, Gandhi spent a portion of nearly everyday spinning yarn and weaving his own clothes. He began this discipline in the early 1920's as part of his swadeshi movement. The idea was two fold. One, to deny the British income from the sale of foreign made products. The second, and more important, idea was to help the poor in India reclaim some independence and dignity by resurrecting a cottage industry, an industry that every Indian could participate in.
When I looked for pictures, I found the classic iconic photos and videos of Gandhi himself sitting at a spinning wheel. There were also photos of large spinning wheel gatherings with hundreds and perhaps thousands of Indians spinning. I could think of nothing comparable in this country.
Simplicity, service, living so as not to hurt others. These are not concepts I understand well.
Simplicity - There's a photo of the few possessions that Gandhi owned when he died. A couple of bowls, glasses, a prayer book, a couple pairs of sandals, a watch, wooden fork and spoon, porcelain monkeys, diary, spittoon, letter opener. I think about what I own. A home, two cars, three computers, five cell phones, dozens of other electric and electronic devices, many, many books, hundreds of pounds of furniture, more clothes than I will ever wear, photos, knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, what-nots, dodads, and thingamabobs galore. There more stuff in my attic and garage, most of which I use only rarely if at all. And my friends think I live simply
Service - Here I am not so bad. I'm a foster parent to two teenager girls and a third now emancipated attending college. I am a member of a twelve step recovery program and I help new members get a good start. I keep my eyes open for opportunities to assist friends and strangers with tasks large and small. I could do more.
Living So As Not To Hurt Others - I could talk about the food I eat or the trash I generate and the list of failures would be long. There are many other areas of my life where I don't live so as not to hurt others, but the one that always jumps out at me is my mode of transportation, my cars. This needs a post all its own. Check back tomorrow.
For most of his life, Gandhi spent a portion of nearly everyday spinning yarn and weaving his own clothes. He began this discipline in the early 1920's as part of his swadeshi movement. The idea was two fold. One, to deny the British income from the sale of foreign made products. The second, and more important, idea was to help the poor in India reclaim some independence and dignity by resurrecting a cottage industry, an industry that every Indian could participate in.
When I looked for pictures, I found the classic iconic photos and videos of Gandhi himself sitting at a spinning wheel. There were also photos of large spinning wheel gatherings with hundreds and perhaps thousands of Indians spinning. I could think of nothing comparable in this country.
Simplicity, service, living so as not to hurt others. These are not concepts I understand well.
Simplicity - There's a photo of the few possessions that Gandhi owned when he died. A couple of bowls, glasses, a prayer book, a couple pairs of sandals, a watch, wooden fork and spoon, porcelain monkeys, diary, spittoon, letter opener. I think about what I own. A home, two cars, three computers, five cell phones, dozens of other electric and electronic devices, many, many books, hundreds of pounds of furniture, more clothes than I will ever wear, photos, knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, what-nots, dodads, and thingamabobs galore. There more stuff in my attic and garage, most of which I use only rarely if at all. And my friends think I live simply
Service - Here I am not so bad. I'm a foster parent to two teenager girls and a third now emancipated attending college. I am a member of a twelve step recovery program and I help new members get a good start. I keep my eyes open for opportunities to assist friends and strangers with tasks large and small. I could do more.
Living So As Not To Hurt Others - I could talk about the food I eat or the trash I generate and the list of failures would be long. There are many other areas of my life where I don't live so as not to hurt others, but the one that always jumps out at me is my mode of transportation, my cars. This needs a post all its own. Check back tomorrow.
28 January 2011
Labor Discussions
I spoke with a friend yesterday about what I had read in The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi concerning manual labor, about the dignity of physical work. My friend has spent many years as a labor organizer and for some years before that was an history professor. My friend is a very learned man and has read all the great labor organizers of the Twentieth Century.
He was fine, in theory, with Gandhi's ideas. "They should be a great family living in unity and harmony, capital not only looking to the material welfare of the labourers but their moral welfare also, - capitalists being the trustees for the welfare of the labouring classes under them." He said, however, that this rarely happened.
As I watch the news in this country, I hear big business people talking about being responsible to their share holders, but never their workers. That means being responsible to profits. To squeezing every dollar out of the bottom line. If there is more money to be made assembling widgets in Mexico because labor is cheaper, throw the American worker out on the street.
And while Gandhi, himself, was certainly "a scavenger, weaver, spinner, farmer and what not," he was also a writer and publisher. He wrote ninety volumes. Ninety volumes is no small intellectual effort. He published newspapers. Hardly manual labor. He was a member of Parliament. He gave speeches. Identifying with labor, yes. A laborer, no.
But my friend's point was that the relationship between capital and labor has almost always been contentious and often, capital has been exploitive of labor. I mean, that's what started the labor movement in this country.
And what is redemptive or spiritual about putting Slot A in Tab B hour after hour, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year, whether or not you are being exploited. I've done these jobs. When I thought I was doing something good, helping teens or protecting the nation or just earning money for my wife and child, I could sustain my spirit, but even then, eventually...I felt ground down, not lifted up. Probably my own failings.
And why does Gandhi and so many other spiritual people down grade mental labor? Why is getting my hands dirty more valued?
And yet, every time I am served by a waitperson at any kind of a food facility, I remember the work my wife did for our family, serving food in a cheap diner, with love and gratitude and I tip my server generously.
It's a confusing subject.
He was fine, in theory, with Gandhi's ideas. "They should be a great family living in unity and harmony, capital not only looking to the material welfare of the labourers but their moral welfare also, - capitalists being the trustees for the welfare of the labouring classes under them." He said, however, that this rarely happened.
As I watch the news in this country, I hear big business people talking about being responsible to their share holders, but never their workers. That means being responsible to profits. To squeezing every dollar out of the bottom line. If there is more money to be made assembling widgets in Mexico because labor is cheaper, throw the American worker out on the street.
And while Gandhi, himself, was certainly "a scavenger, weaver, spinner, farmer and what not," he was also a writer and publisher. He wrote ninety volumes. Ninety volumes is no small intellectual effort. He published newspapers. Hardly manual labor. He was a member of Parliament. He gave speeches. Identifying with labor, yes. A laborer, no.
But my friend's point was that the relationship between capital and labor has almost always been contentious and often, capital has been exploitive of labor. I mean, that's what started the labor movement in this country.
And what is redemptive or spiritual about putting Slot A in Tab B hour after hour, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year, whether or not you are being exploited. I've done these jobs. When I thought I was doing something good, helping teens or protecting the nation or just earning money for my wife and child, I could sustain my spirit, but even then, eventually...I felt ground down, not lifted up. Probably my own failings.
And why does Gandhi and so many other spiritual people down grade mental labor? Why is getting my hands dirty more valued?
And yet, every time I am served by a waitperson at any kind of a food facility, I remember the work my wife did for our family, serving food in a cheap diner, with love and gratitude and I tip my server generously.
It's a confusing subject.
27 January 2011
A Scavenger, Weaver, Spinner, Farmer, and What Not
I'm a chess player. I've been watching the Wijk ann Zee Chess Tournament sponsored this year by Tata Steel currently being held in the Netherlands and what do I read in The Essential Writings of Gandhi this morning? A speech Gandhi gave at the Indian Association on 8 August 1925 about his visit to the Tata Steel plant in Jamshedpur, India.
Gandhi describes himself as a "labourer." "There is a great Latin saying of which the meaning is 'to labour is to pray', and on of the finest writers of Europe has said that a man is not entitled to eat unless he labours, and by labour, he does not mean labour with the intellect, he means labour with the hands."
I have been a laborer (a jet mechanic, a lawn mower, a bicycle repairer, a roofer, a cook, a housekeeper) and have sometimes described myself that way, but I have never taken pride in it as Gandhi did. I've always felt that it was somehow demeaning. That truly intelligent people sat on the rears and thought for a living. Intelligent people manipulated data and information to make their daily bread. That somehow, at the end of the day, if my hands and clothes were dirty, I had failed as a breadwinner.
My parents dreamed of me having a college education and working with my mind and not struggling with my brawn. This is not to blame them. I did not want to be a laborer. I did not want to work with my hands.
How many Americans felt like my parents did, feel like I do? And we wonder why immigrants clean our bathrooms. We wonder why jobs in Detroit are now in Mexico. We wonder why China and India are now overtaking our economy.
I live in a community with many immigrants. I often see the small business owners out in front of their shops sweeping and washing the public sidewalk. They have pride.
Am I entitled to eat today?
Gandhi describes himself as a "labourer." "There is a great Latin saying of which the meaning is 'to labour is to pray', and on of the finest writers of Europe has said that a man is not entitled to eat unless he labours, and by labour, he does not mean labour with the intellect, he means labour with the hands."
I have been a laborer (a jet mechanic, a lawn mower, a bicycle repairer, a roofer, a cook, a housekeeper) and have sometimes described myself that way, but I have never taken pride in it as Gandhi did. I've always felt that it was somehow demeaning. That truly intelligent people sat on the rears and thought for a living. Intelligent people manipulated data and information to make their daily bread. That somehow, at the end of the day, if my hands and clothes were dirty, I had failed as a breadwinner.
My parents dreamed of me having a college education and working with my mind and not struggling with my brawn. This is not to blame them. I did not want to be a laborer. I did not want to work with my hands.
How many Americans felt like my parents did, feel like I do? And we wonder why immigrants clean our bathrooms. We wonder why jobs in Detroit are now in Mexico. We wonder why China and India are now overtaking our economy.
I live in a community with many immigrants. I often see the small business owners out in front of their shops sweeping and washing the public sidewalk. They have pride.
Am I entitled to eat today?
25 January 2011
Praxis
In the early 90's, non-violence was just a theory for me. Less than a theory. It was an idea that my friends and my spiritual community sometimes mentioned.
Then my sister living in Denver called. She wanted to leave the abusive relationship she was in and asked if she could move in with my wife and I. We agreed.
The man followed her. He threatened her, he threatened us, he threatened our Episcopal community.
Non-violence could no longer be a just an idea. Violence hid in the bushes. Literally.
For weeks, we studied, we talked, we trained to prepare for a non-violent response to my sister's abuser. Our community held meetings and we had professionals guide us and help us practice scenarios. We wanted to find a way to quell our fears and have options thought out as much as we could.
There was never any violence. After a few half hearted attempts to talk to my sister, the man gave up and disappeared, but my mind had been stirred by the days and nights of preparation.
I began to examine my life through the lens of non-violence. The examination shed light on many areas of my life where violence was inherent in the choices I made...The choices I make. The food I eat, my mode of transportation, the way I dispose of waste, the way I spend my time and my treasure, is often, too often, violent or supported by violence.
I can't change it all at once. Some of it will probably never change, but one of Gandhi's favorite quotes was from a hymn written by John Henry Newman, a Catholic Priest. "One step enough for me."
Then my sister living in Denver called. She wanted to leave the abusive relationship she was in and asked if she could move in with my wife and I. We agreed.
The man followed her. He threatened her, he threatened us, he threatened our Episcopal community.
Non-violence could no longer be a just an idea. Violence hid in the bushes. Literally.
For weeks, we studied, we talked, we trained to prepare for a non-violent response to my sister's abuser. Our community held meetings and we had professionals guide us and help us practice scenarios. We wanted to find a way to quell our fears and have options thought out as much as we could.
There was never any violence. After a few half hearted attempts to talk to my sister, the man gave up and disappeared, but my mind had been stirred by the days and nights of preparation.
I began to examine my life through the lens of non-violence. The examination shed light on many areas of my life where violence was inherent in the choices I made...The choices I make. The food I eat, my mode of transportation, the way I dispose of waste, the way I spend my time and my treasure, is often, too often, violent or supported by violence.
I can't change it all at once. Some of it will probably never change, but one of Gandhi's favorite quotes was from a hymn written by John Henry Newman, a Catholic Priest. "One step enough for me."
24 January 2011
"The Mind is Like a Drunken Monkey"
Letter to Mathuradas Trikumji, November 1, 1921, from The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi, p.29
Gandhi struggled his whole life with his desires. He had great control over his actions, but felt that true enlightenment would be reached only when he had control over his desires.
I have only minimal control over my actions and no control over my desires. I want what I want when I want it. And far too often I satisfy my wants or become petulant, angry, and petty when I don't get what I want even if I, myself, show some modicum of self-restraint.
Gandhi struggled his whole life with his desires. He had great control over his actions, but felt that true enlightenment would be reached only when he had control over his desires.
I have only minimal control over my actions and no control over my desires. I want what I want when I want it. And far too often I satisfy my wants or become petulant, angry, and petty when I don't get what I want even if I, myself, show some modicum of self-restraint.
“A boat and a bigger boat and a ship and a bigger ship and desire and a carrot and a carrot and a carrot and desire and desire and desire and desire.” –Spaulding Gray, Swimming to Cambodia, 1987
It's the American Dream.
It is not my dream. But my dream scares me. How can I be happy if I don't get the next latest and greatest thing? How can I be happy if I don't get to travel the world and see all the amazing places there are to see? How can I be happy if I don't eat great food and watch TV and play games on my computer and drive a nice car and live in a beautiful home? The list of things I 'need' to be 'happy' seems endless.
That pretty much describes my mind. I have little control over my thoughts, feelings and actions.
My mind is like a drunken monkey. "Mere effort is not enough for controlling it." I need outside help. I need a spiritual program. I need a power greater than myself.
23 January 2011
"Pitched betwixt Heaven and Charing Cross"
This morning I read the first half of the Introduction to "The Essential Writings of Mahatma Gandhi" edited by Raghavan Iyer. I read the book many years ago and have referred to it many times since.
In the first paragraph, Mr. Iyer writes about one of Gandhi's ideals of political philosophy, sarvodaya (universal uplift or the uplift of all), "treat all possessions as if they were sacred and priceless." Then I look at my messy desk, a clutter of papers, books, computer hardware, photos, and precious mementos. Some of it is sacred and priceless. Too much of it is bookkeeping, or simple accumulation due to laziness or fear that I might dispose of something that I will later 'need.'
"It is only through daily moral choices and the meritorious and sagacious employment of limited resources in the social sphere that individuals sustain their inherited and acquired entitlements. For this very reason, the divisive and dangerous notion of exclusive ownership is systematically misleading and, at worst, a specious and subtle form of violence."
"Daily moral choices" - I'm not good at this. It sounds like hard work. I guess that's why the Jacob's Ladder is crowded with angels climbing up and down - to help me with the choices.
"He (Gandhi) translated his painful insights into daily acts of tapas - self-chosen spiritual exercises and the repeated renewal of lifelong meditation in the midst of his fervent social activity."
Does this mean that every scrap of paper is a moral choice? Every television show I watch? Every web site I visit? Every choice is a moral choice.
I have a long way to go.
22 January 2011
Duck & Cover
In 1962, I was in the 2nd grade in south Denver, Colorado. We started having Air Raid Drills during school. (Much later in life a I put together the facts. Cuban Missile Crisis and a big mountain in southern Colorado that housed NORAD.) The drills scared me. I dreamed of tiny planes dropping black bombs on my school. The Cold War was in full swing.
Somewhere during my early teens, I started thinking about atomic bombs. We had thousands. The Soviets had thousands. It seemed clear to me that if you exploded that many hydrogen bombs on the surface of the planet that it would probably destroy the atmosphere. Nuclear Winter became a popular concept some years later.
And when had we as a species not used a weapon in a war. And when had there not been another war.
I didn't think I would live to 30. If the balloon went up, I intended to sit on the roof of my house and watch the incoming missiles.
In 1977, my wife was pregnant and I was a college drop out with no marketable skills. I joined the Air Force. They made me an F-4E Crew Chief. My name was spray painted on the left side of the front cockpit. I followed my "aerospace vehicle" to Germany for an exercise. In a concrete revetment, on the final day of the exercise. We loaded a live nuclear bomb on my plane. We'd loaded lots of dummies during exercises in the states, but here in Germany, a man with a gun guarded us at all times. I started the engines and taxied my plane out of the bunker and saluted the pilots and prepared for the end of the world.
A month later I was baptized. I believed we as a species needed a miracle to survive. I only knew one place to look for a miracle.
In the early '90's, I became involved with a bunch of Episcopal Radicals. They talked about non-violence. I didn't know what that meant, so I started reading. Being a small "f" fundamentalist, I went back to Gandhi.
I've lost my way over the intervening years. I'm going back to Gandhi.
Join me.
Somewhere during my early teens, I started thinking about atomic bombs. We had thousands. The Soviets had thousands. It seemed clear to me that if you exploded that many hydrogen bombs on the surface of the planet that it would probably destroy the atmosphere. Nuclear Winter became a popular concept some years later.
And when had we as a species not used a weapon in a war. And when had there not been another war.
I didn't think I would live to 30. If the balloon went up, I intended to sit on the roof of my house and watch the incoming missiles.
In 1977, my wife was pregnant and I was a college drop out with no marketable skills. I joined the Air Force. They made me an F-4E Crew Chief. My name was spray painted on the left side of the front cockpit. I followed my "aerospace vehicle" to Germany for an exercise. In a concrete revetment, on the final day of the exercise. We loaded a live nuclear bomb on my plane. We'd loaded lots of dummies during exercises in the states, but here in Germany, a man with a gun guarded us at all times. I started the engines and taxied my plane out of the bunker and saluted the pilots and prepared for the end of the world.
A month later I was baptized. I believed we as a species needed a miracle to survive. I only knew one place to look for a miracle.
In the early '90's, I became involved with a bunch of Episcopal Radicals. They talked about non-violence. I didn't know what that meant, so I started reading. Being a small "f" fundamentalist, I went back to Gandhi.
I've lost my way over the intervening years. I'm going back to Gandhi.
Join me.
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